n. A Puerto Rican kept chained to your mailbox to keep any and all small children out of your yard. Usually equipped with a giant log for said flogging of babies. Usually of a more muscular caliber. Can be adopted or bought at a local Mental Iinstitution.
Little kid: "hold on i think the ball landed in Mr. Jose's yard.
Puerto Rican Peacekeeper: *ar rahg rahg rahg rahg groooooowl*
Little kid : Jesus in heaven help me!!! He has my fucking left testicle in his jaws!!! Oh dear Christ the pain!!!