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Definitions by The one they call whale lover

Whale fucked 

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Usually meaning that the current situation is similar to being fucked in the ear by a sperm whale. Which is for some reason considered a bad thing.

Used only when "we're fucked" is not enough to explain the current ongoing situation.
Person 1:
My principal/mother just kicked me out of school because she tried to seduce me and now I'm homeless and I think my legs just fell off
Person 2:
Dude you're whale fucked.