Skip to main content

St. John's College 

A Liberal Arts college in the US, with two campuses: one in Santa Fe, New Mexico, and a needlessly preppy one, populated mostly by sophists. Famous for its approach to liberal arts, focus on great books, and its incredibly uncomfortable, but visually iconic, "Johnnie" chairs. Blackboards are everywhere at the college, and any attempt to change this policy is always crushed with extreme prejudice.

Students of the college are called Johnnies., and in place of professors, instructors are called tutors. This is because they are supposed to be on the journey of intellectual discovery with the students, rather than talking down to them. This is, most certainly, always the case, and tutors have never been known to give lectures in the middle of class to explain exactly why a particular school of thought is fundamentally incorrect because they entirely disregard the writings of one obscure thinker, the essays of whom said tutor will be happy to provide to the interested.

St. John's has no tests or exams. All students are evaluated through their writing and performance in discussion. To deal with the stress and anxiety which comes with much of the work of the college, many Johnnies smoke and engage in extreme forms of Bacchic revelry on a weekly to biweekly basis.

Contrary to popular belief regarding liberal arts degrees, Johnnies go into a variety of fields, mostly in education, academia, or corporate sophistry(commonly known to the uninitiated as the legal profession).
"Where are you going to college again?"
"Oh, I go to St. John's College in Santa Fe."
"Never heard of it."
"I'm not surprised."

Family member:"What do you guys even do at St. John's?"
Johnnie who has learned that most people are either totally disinterested in the truly meaningful parts of their studies and has lost all faith in the ability of most people to have serious conversations: "We read lots of books."
St. John's College by notsocrates December 2, 2020
St. John's College mug front
Get the St. John's College mug.
See more merch

St. John's College 

A Liberal Arts college in the US, with two campuses: one in Santa Fe, New Mexico, and a needlessly preppy one, populated mostly by sophists. Famous for its approach to liberal arts, focus on great books, and its incredibly uncomfortable, but visually iconic, "Johnnie" chairs. Blackboards are everywhere at the college, and any attempt to change this policy is always crushed with extreme prejudice.

Students of the college are called Johnnies., and in place of professors, instructors are called tutors. This is because they are supposed to be on the journey of intellectual discovery with the students, rather than talking down to them. This is, most certainly, always the case, and tutors have never been known to give lectures in the middle of class to explain exactly why a particular school of thought is fundamentally incorrect because they entirely disregard the writings of one obscure thinker, the essays of whom said tutor will be happy to provide to the interested.

St. John's has no tests or exams. All students are evaluated through their writing and performance in discussion. To deal with the stress and anxiety which comes with much of the work of the college, many Johnnies smoke and engage in extreme forms of Bacchic revelry on a weekly to biweekly basis.

Contrary to popular belief regarding liberal arts degrees, Johnnies go into a variety of fields, mostly in education, academia, or corporate sophistry(commonly known to the uninitiated as the legal profession).
"Where are you going to college again?"
"Oh, I go to St. John's College in Santa Fe."
"Never heard of it."
"I'm not surprised."

Family member:"What do you guys even do at St. John's?"
Johnnie who has learned that most people are either totally disinterested in the truly meaningful parts of their studies and has lost all faith in the ability of most people to have serious conversations: "We read lots of books."
St. John's College by notsocrates December 2, 2020

St. John's Basketball 

Storied men's basketball program of St. John's University in Jamaica, Queens, NY. Home of Lavinwood.

Head Coach: Steve Lavin

2011: #3 Recruiting Class in Nation
Joe: St. John's basketball is rocking the Garden!

John: Yeah, not like those Cuse posers from the middle of no where.

Joe: The Red Storm is New York City's team!!
St. John's Basketball by stjjjj August 1, 2011

St. John's surprise 

To refuse to pay a whore after she has provided you with her services. This is a common practice at St. John's University.
I owed the bitch my last $5 but I decided I'd rather spend it on a couple of Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers so I jumped out the window and gave her the old St. John's surprise.
St. John's surprise by Nick D March 18, 2004

St. John's 

the capital city of the Province of Newfoundland and Labrador in Canada.
St. John's is a great town to party in!
St. John's by Figleaf23 January 2, 2009

St. John’s Country Day school 

Full of ignorant, rich, white kids at a private high school. They often get butthurt over minor inconveniences such as tucking a shirt in or shaving your face.
St. John’s Country Day school kids are very annoying.

St John's College Cardiff 

A shit school with shit people and shit teachers. Like Ms Jones really be out here giving people death stares and shiz. The teachers really be Givin detentions for not bringing a book and having ur hair down. Like actually why? All of them really be not calm. And jus no. Girls really be out here having boyfriends with 2 years oldrr. And girls thinking they run the school and the boys think they be drug dealers or some shit. But they really jus be wearing puma.
St John's college Cardiff is shet