1. A person who resides in Toronto
, Ontario, Canada.
2. A person who has lost all idea of common courtesy, personal space, reality, etc. They have also been known to; wait for you to open a door, then
run through it before you can; not give up seats to pregnant women on public
transit (they're more important); whisper things
breath about your
mother if you take more than 1.2 seconds
proceed to order
a double-java-mocha-ultra-non-fat-goat's-milk latte; ignore your
attempts to exit a subway and remain
scoff at you when you say 'Excuse me.'; generally ignore anybody beyond themselves.
3. A hipster douchebag. This type of Torontonian has been known to; shop at Salvation Army
because it's 'cool to look
poor' although both their
parents are doctors; name their
band after something
that has to do with Japan (ie. Tokyo Police Club); go to coffee
places that tell you they're serving free
but it's actually Folger's sold
at 400% mark-up; pretend to have intelligible things
to say about world events because they read about it on somebody's blog; act like they have their
own unique style although all hipsters look
the same (you're no different
than thugs, preps, bro's, etc.); live at their
parent's house in Forest Hill but spend all their
time in Kensington Market; etc.
Male Torontonian hipsters have been known to wear tighter
pants than the females - no scientific journal
has been able to decipher this strange behaviour. The males are also often mistaken
for a member of the Village People - skin-tight pants, mustache, 80's sun glasses, bad hair cuit - but believes he is still
Female hispters are not hot.
4. An incorrectly
labelled person who resides in Toronto
but was born and raised in another
city. Often mistaken
for an actual Torontonian, these individuals take offense to the label. They are often
courteous, attractive, smart, and will choose to cheer for any other hockey team besides the Maple
Leafs. They tend to move to Toronto
to further their career
contemplate moving back
in with their
parents and living on welfare just to get out of the city of Toronto
1. Hey! You're a Torontonian because you live in Toronto!
2. Person A:Man that
guy is a douche!
Person B: They
don't call them Torontians
3. Person A: That chick
Person B: Dude, that
's a male hipster
4. Newfoundlander: Fuck you, you fucking Torontonian scum.
Incorrectly-labelled Torontonian: Fuck you! That
guy is the Torontonian - I'm from
Ottawa! *Points to guy wearing tight pants with a mustache, listening to Feist*