1 definition by New Jersey Blows

Essentially, a giant suburban landscape filled to the brim with strip malls, outdoor shopping plazas with god forsaken asphalt seas, and awful drivers to complete the package. I've lived in the state all my life and it has provided me nothing but agonizing years of pain and boredom. While some parts of the state feature fairly attractive rural areas, quaint towns untouched by idiotic guido scum and historic architecture, the majority of it is housing developments and moronic people who never got up and moved west but would rather pay exuberent taxes. The McMansion reigns supreme and it takes forever to drive anywhere. It is the worst example of post-war America next to Long Island and Los Angeles. Mediocre public transport, identical housing tracts, and bland boring suburban culture.

New Jersey can be divided into three parts, North, Central, and South.

The North, it is populated by your typical Bergen county types who range from retarded Italians to cracked out minority. Despite it's proximity to New York, it is fairly unsafe and still suffers from extreme amounts of crime and poverty.

Central New Jersey is the heart of suburbia as it lacks access to nothing worthwhile aside malls and diners, which in turn, are boring and pathetic examples of pride which others deem them. Princeton University is located here, but most people in New Jersey rarely visit it considering Princeton is one large Asian fortress that keeps to it's own.

Southern New Jersey is the epitome of the country but with all the charm of being mentally ill. Despite proximity to Philadelphia, it too suffers from crime in nearby Camden.

And then there's the shore, or beach areas. Basically overpriced slums with a wooden walkway known as a boardwalk for you to fritter away your time before you return to your respective suburb.

Do not come to New Jersey. It's like everywhere else in America that you hate, but worse.
New Jersey is awful, I'm moving to California.
by New Jersey Blows August 15, 2009

Free Daily Email

Type your email address below to get our free Urban Word of the Day every morning!

Emails are sent from daily@urbandictionary.com. We'll never spam you.

×