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2 definitions by KayDoe

 
1.
to make it simple: Christians that originated in ancient-Mesopotamia and now settle in northern Iraq... Detroit, MI, San Diego, CA, Windsor, ON, and various parts of Europe and Asia.

the truth:

Chaldeans don't give a fuck about anything except the important things in life: Family (friends are already considered family) and Prosperity. Also to get married so they don't have to hear "whenna zowage whenna zowage" everyday we wake up. The only way you will ever be able to get into a Chaldeans house is when you are respected and only that- respect is more important than anything and it goes both ways.

Upon taking your shoes off after you close the door behind you, you are greeted by parents who want to know your last name and what village you're from and if you know 30-40 other Chaldeans they might think you're related to. At the end of these type of conversations you find out you're basically my 4th cousin and you are welcome to help yourself to the fridge anytime you are in the hood. By this point you will notice ashtrays are actually being used for Pistachio shells and there are several plates of almonds/cashews/sunflowerseeds all put at strategic places - by televisions or phones or where baba sits. That and there are two freezers and we're not alowwed to let you know where the other one is because it contains 3000$ worth of meats.

It doesn't matter how old you are, if you're Chaldean and you're 16 or 24 your mom will still give you a call if its past midnight and let you know shes not going to sleep until you walk in. 99% of the time you'll walk into the house past 3am and find out she's still awake watching al-ashur/al-jeerza (DISH) because its the morning back home and the best drama shows come on at this time.

The only reason Chaldeans came to the U.S. was because Saddam took over Iraq and completely fucked everything up there. The U.S. was the easiest place to make money, and that's why we control every corner in Detroit and it only took us 20 years(without learning how to properly speak english, bitches.) That's life, you work hard and take chances then you will be rewarded.

There are only about 1-2 million Chaldeans (more if you would like to include Assyrians) total. In Michigan, most live in Sterling Heights, Detroit, and everything between (Warren, Madison Heights, Hazel Park, Royal Oak, Southfield, etc.) People on the east hate people on the west but we only hate eachother after hating bait en john's and quadas.
typical conversation between Chaldeans:

Khalid: "Brashid Babukh those are some hadeed Force's cuz meriam athera on my grandmothers life."

Tarboosh: "Habibi they were tax free from this abbid that sold them to me for 10$ at the liquor store."

Khalid: "Say I swear to God."

Tarboosh: "Meriam."
by KayDoe November 07, 2006
 
2.
Uber jerkface.
Gawd! That guy is always so mean. He is such a morgan.
by kaydoe May 11, 2014