3 definitions by Josh the expo

Top Definition
A game whose object is for one male to slap another male in the balls for the sole purpose of everyone else's amusement. The game is generally played on a specific day of the week, namely Sunday. There are also certain variants of the game, such as including women and adding beaver chops to the game. Also, no slap backs, so you can't right away hit the balls of the person that just hit you.
After putting up with that stupid asshole all week, I couldn't wait to chop Elliott in the nuts on slap ball Sunday.
by Josh the expo July 09, 2006
Another fine game played in restaurants, in a similar manner as slap ball Sunday, only in this case on a Tuesday. The object of the game is simple, dole out as many titty twisters as possible. Until a girl initiates a titty twister it is taboo to give one to a girl. Generally there is a "hands only" rule so objects like tongs and forks cannot be used. Managers can be included into the game as well either by their consent or their administration of a titty twister. Anyone who can pull off the "double twist" (two at the same time, but not necessarily the same person) is considered immortal.
After repeatedly trying to whip my ass with a towel all week, I couldn't wait to wreak havoc on Bill's nipples on Titty Twister Tuesday.
by Josh the expo July 11, 2006
The State of Pennsylvania's form of a Welfare card. Naturally abused by most (not all, I'm sure a minority of those using it actually DO put it to the intended use), the Access card is a bitch for the rest of us. It always works out that some asshole on Welfare is right in front of you in the "8 Items or Less" checkout with potato chips, a case of motor oil, weave, ass loads of kool-aid, a box of rubbers (ironically), a Snickers bar, a case of toilet paper, and some milk. As if it wasn't bad enough that the ignorant bastard has more than 8 items, then they have to seperate the order into two orders...the Access order, and the <i>Pennsylvania Says 'Fuck You' Lazy Ass</i> order. So first comes the order paid in cash, which goes well. Then out comes the greenish-blue and yellow Access card! **stabs chest with car keys** So Captain 3-tooth swipes his card for the fourth time, and still a denial message. Why, you ask? Well Mr.DipShit didn't notice that he doesn't have shit on his card!!! It's over halfway through the month, what did he expect?
After holding up the checkout for 15 minutes, LaShaniqua gave up on the sixteenth swipe of her Access card and pulled out a Benjamin, got a receipt, and we all clapped.
by Josh the Expo October 18, 2006

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