Now a 45 year old attention whore, Clemens was once a great baseball player who has played for the Toronto Blue Jays, the Houston Astros, and the New York Yankees. As he got older he's become a roid freak to win back his long time boyfriend Brian McNamee. But it costed him his respect and fame.
Roger Clemens is too old. But he just won't give up.
A Filipino actress who just can't seem to grow out of childrens movies due to the marketing ploy called the "High School Musical" trilogy. Despite that she's had nude photos taken of her across the internet, there really is nothing or hers worth staring at. With no particular beauty, no particular talent, and a bitchy personality, the only thing that's keeping her a celebrity is (1) tenure from Disney, (2) her pussy, Zac Efron
and her best friend, Ashley Tisdale
, and (3) the media being forced to keep their eyes on her. One Disney alumni who practically is the opposite of Vanessa Hudgens is Hayden Panettiere
, who actually has dedicated her life to making the world better for everyone.
Girl: Oh my god! Vanessa Hudgens is in here! Let's go meet her right away!
Boy: Hey, isn't that one of those "cool" kids from our school? Sure looks like it.
Girl: What?! But she's...uh...she's got a ton of money. Yeah!
Boy: Like the kind she finds in her underwear at clubs?
Girl: I guess your right, perhaps I can find girls hotter AND more friendly than her. It's possible.
A goddess of the creatures of the sea with an outgoing and friendly personality. She takes the form of an extremely attractive human who happens to be one of America's most successful movie actresses. She was a cheerleader during her years in school and has acted in many roles of cheerleaders in movies, but her most notable role is Claire Bennet from Heroes, where one of her unnecessary powers, regeneration, is put to use. The reason she has chosen the form of an attractive human is to draw the attention to build support to help keep alive her two groups of cohorts called the "Whales" and the "Dolphins", whether it's acting out as the spokesman for the Whaleman Foundation, making bold attempts to save fellow comrades from getting slaughtered personally, known as "Saving The World", or reaching out to her fans via the internet. Hayden is also a singer/songwriter, and her human boyfriend is Milo Ventimiglia, who also plays a character on Heroes.
Girl: My report is on Hayden Panettiere.
Boy: Who the hell's that?
Girl: Oh, she's an actress known as the "Cheerleader who wants to Save the World."
Boy: Pfft. Cheerleaders? Boring. Why not do one on Britney Spears?
Girl: ...Are you kidding me?! God I bet is laughing at you right now.
A daily block of mini sports soap operas packed into one hour. Programs listed in order and the length of the episodes vary:
Manny Knows Best
The Favre Saga
The Misadventures of T.O.
The Red Sox Chronicles (or sometimes a rerun of Yankee Country)
repeat the cycle until 2PM EST.
And check this, they leave women doing the morning shift.
ESPN anchor: And still to come, we take a trip to Ben Roethlisberger's natural habitat at the Pittsburgh Zoo. Later, a rapper comes on stage! What the fuck does this have to do with sports? Who knows?! Don't tell us how to do our business, bitch! It's nawmally good!
Viewer: Man, even Sportscenter could use an offseason.
1. a felt of sheepskin pad placed between a horse's back and the saddle to prevent chafing
2. a word used in the 2008 Spelling Bee which was confused with "numnut".
Speller: "Numnut?"... Oh! "Numnah"!
A character from Naruto, the popular Anime & Manga series. Known for having only the discipline of Taijutsu & the drunken fighting style. The first person to actually successfully attack Garra of the Desert. Lee is also able to shoot lasers from his eyebrows & the his abilities comes from his bowl cut. Lee is the most popular Naruto character for African Americans to cosplay as.
Guy: Rock Lee, haven't you had enough training already?
Lee: If I can't brush my hair 300 times, I am set to go for 500 nostril flares. 214, 215, 216, 217--
A funny name for Disney's untalented douchebag prettyboy, Zac Efron
. In relation to the bankrupt Energy corporation known as Enron
. Used as an insult to clue people in that Efron will go out of style pretty soon as well as every Disney Channel
Zac Efron: I'm Zac Enron! I am afraid of girls, I have no penis, and I kill small animals with my voice! I hate you. Can I have all your money for my marketing ploy?
Average American: That's nice, sir. Tell somebody who cares.