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8 definitions by Haz Hazard

 
1.
Those of us males with diverse sexual history and experiences, involving unusual or exotic circumstances, paraphenalia, and partners. The metaphorical Dick has a tool for every occassion, and varies accordingly when erect.
Old Swiss Army Dick had another 5-way last weekend.
by Haz Hazard June 16, 2008
 
2.
the stain on your pants left behind when you get a lap dance from a stripper who's on her period
Candy at the Gold Club gave me a rusty knee last night and ruined my cotton dockers
by Haz Hazard September 24, 2008
 
3.
An off-shoot of the famous Blumpkin (getting head while taking a shit) but performed in an outhouse. Porto-potties are an acceptable substitute, provided the location is rural.
"Uncle Cooter done got a Country Blumpkin from Mary Jane Rottencrotch last night"
by Haz Hazard June 13, 2008
 
4.
A drink trifecta, popular in Ohio, in which the patron is served a Molson, a Bud and a Corona, drinks all three, and then leaves without paying.
I had a NAFTA Special at TGI Fridays and it didn't cost me a dime.
by Haz Hazard June 16, 2008
 
5.
One's pre-conceived notions regarding a woman's potential propensity to put out in the sack.
Jill exceeded all sexspectations when we hooked up on friday
by Haz Hazard July 28, 2008
 
6.
Leaning a chair at an angle up against a door so no one can get in from the outside
I can't get in to Pedro's methlab, he's got the Mexican Deadbolt on
by Haz Hazard August 23, 2011
 
7.
doing a small amount of cocaine the morning after a binge to get one's day started
i'll need a California jumpstart if we're going to make the wedding on time
by Haz Hazard July 08, 2010