1 definition by Die Soccer Moms
| 1. | Soccer Mom | ||
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Fat ass middle-age bitch whose whole life revolves around her children. Drives a mini-van or large SUV due to multiple children. Usually puts stickers on the back car window saying things such as, "Ashley #10 Soccer." Their day consists of:
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-Wake up & pack lunches for kids (No sweets, pop, or anything unhealthy) -Make sure the kids eat a nutritional breakfast -Review the kids outfits -Drive them to school -Clean -Pick them up from school -Take ___ to soccer, ___ to ballet, and ___ to bible study. -Pick all the kids up and get them all happy meals from McDonald's. -Tells kids to start getting ready for bed, because it is already 7 PM -Has very unpleasant sex with their apathetic husbands once kids are fast asleep Commonly enjoys wearing knit sweaters with high water jeans. Usually have cheesy knick-knacks in their home, such as plates hung on the wall that say things like, "Hope" "Faith" "Believe" etc. Their children are extremely shielded from the real world, not being allowed to watch anything with bad language or sexual references. Can only watch PG-13 movies once they actually turn 13. Must be approved by the soccer mom first. Can't buy music, watch TV, hang out with friends, or anything without approval from their soccer mom first. They install V-Chips and/or parental controls on 3/4 of the TV channels. This leaves educational channels, which they usually end up blocking because of real life content. Ex. The History Channel, The Animal Planet. Usually pus... |
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