2 definitions by Bort P. Krunt

Top Definition
The most vile, insipid, sanity-destroyingly horrible genre in the history of cinema. The romantic comedy is a genre of movie, usually mainstream, that follows a fairly consistant formula: boy meets girl, silly shit happens, low-intensity comedy insues, mild disasters averted, boy and girl get married and live happily ever after, the end. This formula never changes, for if there were the slightest deviation, it would not ba a romantic comedy. This genre exists solely for the entertainment of obnoxious, highly sentimental housewives who feel that their gender must consign them to this terrible fate. For them, to be feminine is to be an obnoxious, hand-wringing milksop. This is similar to the viewpoint among men that to be masculine is to be an obnoxious, belligerent neanderthal who crushes beer cans with his forehead. Romantic comedy is cinematic anti-matter. It is the opposite of art, and can not, by nature, be creative or original in any way. Romantic comedies are as plentiful as they are unbearable, due to the consistent market for sappy, brain-dead entertainment. A watcher of romatic comedies never gets tired of the same plot, over and over and over again, and therefore can watch the same movie, with subtle variations, thousands of times over a lifetime, viewing each new clone as if it were the first.

People of average intelligence are advised avoid this genre if at all possible, as it has been known to cause severe drowsiness, ennui, brain leakage through the ears and, in rare cases, extreme homicidal rage.
DVD's of previous years' romantic comedy hits are best suited for use as a cheap and durable paving and flooring material, and are of about the right size to be used as targets for archery and riflery practice.

I re-tiled my bathroom floor with surplus copies of You've Got Mail, and at half the cost of ceramic tile!
by Bort P. Krunt September 25, 2006
A term used in Western Mass. for Getty Mart, a chain of mini-mart/gas stations owned by the Getty oil corporation. Possibly due to the prevalence of Getty marts in poorer neighborhoods, or possibly because of the shitty service and generally tacky nature of most Getty Mart franchises.
I bought a pack of beef jerky and a tonic water at the Getto Mart.
by Bort P. Krunt September 25, 2006

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