Somthing that was made SPECIFICALLY to piss ,"Biafra J," off. Chances are this person is EMO, and just needs somthing to bitch about in his otherwise empty life...
The reality is that smoking calms you down, and the world would be a better place if EVERYONE smoked-- Even babies!
The reality is that smoking calms you down, and the world would be a better place if EVERYONE smoked-- Even babies!
"I haven't beat the shit out of anyone since I started smoking..."
by Brandon "Swiffer" A. April 30, 2005
A highly controversial, highly profitable product on the market that is made to be smoked.
It is under fire because it destroys the human body in innumerable ways, is highly addictive, and has no medical benefit whatsoever. Generally, people who have been smoking for an extended period of times regret the experience and try to quit in vain (due to the fact that nicotine, a highly addictive substance, is contained in cigarettes). There are many strategies to quitting smoking such as a nicotine patch or chewing gum, designed to satiate the smoker's need for nicotine without killing the buyer.
Despite the fact that these products aimed at helping people quit smoking are making off very well, cigarettes are being banned in some other countries, and the discover that cigarettes contain types of poison and unsavory ingredients, this does not stop the average brain-dead teenager from picking up a pack and effectively inducing five different kinds of hell on their lungs.
Meanwhile, most other people regard them as complete idiots, and they will too, ten years down the line. Cigarettes are the things that some kids in every generation pick up and, being the stupid asshats that they are, think is actually helping them in some twisted way; when in fact, they will look back in twenty years when they are diagnosed with leukemia, mutter, "Wow, I was such a stupid asshat back then.". Then they will have stupid asshat kids, and those kids will, despite their parents' warnings, smoke cigarettes thinking that it's helping them in some twisted way.
Because as we all know, Stupidity is much stronger than logic, fact, and desire to keep one's lungs intact.
It is under fire because it destroys the human body in innumerable ways, is highly addictive, and has no medical benefit whatsoever. Generally, people who have been smoking for an extended period of times regret the experience and try to quit in vain (due to the fact that nicotine, a highly addictive substance, is contained in cigarettes). There are many strategies to quitting smoking such as a nicotine patch or chewing gum, designed to satiate the smoker's need for nicotine without killing the buyer.
Despite the fact that these products aimed at helping people quit smoking are making off very well, cigarettes are being banned in some other countries, and the discover that cigarettes contain types of poison and unsavory ingredients, this does not stop the average brain-dead teenager from picking up a pack and effectively inducing five different kinds of hell on their lungs.
Meanwhile, most other people regard them as complete idiots, and they will too, ten years down the line. Cigarettes are the things that some kids in every generation pick up and, being the stupid asshats that they are, think is actually helping them in some twisted way; when in fact, they will look back in twenty years when they are diagnosed with leukemia, mutter, "Wow, I was such a stupid asshat back then.". Then they will have stupid asshat kids, and those kids will, despite their parents' warnings, smoke cigarettes thinking that it's helping them in some twisted way.
Because as we all know, Stupidity is much stronger than logic, fact, and desire to keep one's lungs intact.
There are many corporations that profit off of human ignorance and people devoid of their own fucking brains, but none as much as the companies producing cigarettes.
by The guy that is going to have 50x your income in ten years. April 25, 2007
There are two different definitions for the word "cigarette".
Here they are:
Smoker: The fag of your life. You can trust it, you can thrust it, you can suck it, you can fuck it. It makes my day. You would go mow the lawn for mommy and daddy just to have money to buy another pack. You would risk getting put in jail by using a fake ID JUST to buy another pack. People tell you it's addicting, you tell them that you COULD quit, you just don't want to.
Look at it like this, if you didn't smoke, you would never randomly go outside to get some fresh air and what could be more unhealthy than being inside all day...
Non-smoker: "Smoking a FUCKING smelly-addicting-disgusting cigarette!"
Well, as for the non-smoker, FUCK YOU! If we are no closet smoker in front of you, we obviously don't "give a hoot about what you think"-Weezer, yaaa.
So, in short, cigarettes are pretty cool and I donts gives a fuck if I die.
Here they are:
Smoker: The fag of your life. You can trust it, you can thrust it, you can suck it, you can fuck it. It makes my day. You would go mow the lawn for mommy and daddy just to have money to buy another pack. You would risk getting put in jail by using a fake ID JUST to buy another pack. People tell you it's addicting, you tell them that you COULD quit, you just don't want to.
Look at it like this, if you didn't smoke, you would never randomly go outside to get some fresh air and what could be more unhealthy than being inside all day...
Non-smoker: "Smoking a FUCKING smelly-addicting-disgusting cigarette!"
Well, as for the non-smoker, FUCK YOU! If we are no closet smoker in front of you, we obviously don't "give a hoot about what you think"-Weezer, yaaa.
So, in short, cigarettes are pretty cool and I donts gives a fuck if I die.
"OH EMM EFFF GEEE! Look at HER! WHY IS SHE SO HAPPY!?!...IS SHE DRUNK OR HIGH OR BOTH!? Drugs are REALLY EXPENSIVE!"
"Nooo! Look! She's just smoking a delicious cigarette!"
"ooooh."
"Nooo! Look! She's just smoking a delicious cigarette!"
"ooooh."
by Nehmrack July 11, 2008
I watched my grandfather die of lung cancer from smoking cigarettes, and it is something I don't want happening to me or anybody else I care about. Go ahead and rate me down all you want! Just know that I am just speaking from experience, and that the ratio of thumbs up to thumbs down will no affect me at all!
by MetalHead16 October 22, 2010
Cig-a-rette – noun
1. A consumable product used for enhancing appearance and social aptitude. Also causes worries to melt away.
2. A delicious treat demonized in Nazi Germany as a genetic poison to Aryans whilst blaming and marginalizing minorities for their use.
3. The perfect device for relaxation that can help to prevent Alzheimer's Disease, Parkinson's Disease,
1. A consumable product used for enhancing appearance and social aptitude. Also causes worries to melt away.
2. A delicious treat demonized in Nazi Germany as a genetic poison to Aryans whilst blaming and marginalizing minorities for their use.
3. The perfect device for relaxation that can help to prevent Alzheimer's Disease, Parkinson's Disease,
1. Cool smoker 1: That busted chick over there has potential to be a hottie.
Cool smoker 2: I can see that; you should give her a cigarette to fix her.
2. Non-smoker bitch: Hey smoker guy, smoking is bad for you and causes cancer.
Cool smoker guy: Hitler didn’t smoke, and he killed about six million Jews. You don’t hate Jews, do you?
Non-smoker bitch: Oh, well I don’t want to be an Anti-Semite… Mind if I bum one?
3. Pussy: You know; cigarettes kill you, right?
Cool smoker guy: The oldest recorded person smoked from the time she was 21 to the time she was 117?
Pussy: Huh, I didn't know that. I suppose my argument is debunk.
Cool smoker guy: Well then, GTFO pussy.
Cool smoker 2: I can see that; you should give her a cigarette to fix her.
2. Non-smoker bitch: Hey smoker guy, smoking is bad for you and causes cancer.
Cool smoker guy: Hitler didn’t smoke, and he killed about six million Jews. You don’t hate Jews, do you?
Non-smoker bitch: Oh, well I don’t want to be an Anti-Semite… Mind if I bum one?
3. Pussy: You know; cigarettes kill you, right?
Cool smoker guy: The oldest recorded person smoked from the time she was 21 to the time she was 117?
Pussy: Huh, I didn't know that. I suppose my argument is debunk.
Cool smoker guy: Well then, GTFO pussy.
by CoolSmokerGuy March 7, 2010
coffin nails which kill people in the most horrific ways since the black death. cigarette compainies make billions on your backs. you mean nothing to them.
Pros. The sex appeal (cough)
Cons. It kills you
they have a horrific taste
they control you once addicted
more addictve than most drugs
destroy your lungs and your bronchioles
make your beauty decrease rapidly due to nicotine over-load
cost a lot to buy
Once addicted lose real pleasure
very anti-social
Pros. The sex appeal (cough)
Cons. It kills you
they have a horrific taste
they control you once addicted
more addictve than most drugs
destroy your lungs and your bronchioles
make your beauty decrease rapidly due to nicotine over-load
cost a lot to buy
Once addicted lose real pleasure
very anti-social
Youre paying someone to kill you slowly- why dont i just come round and drill holes into your skin every week?
Dont be a fool.
Dont be a fool.
by Biafra J September 4, 2004
--- The very articles of addiction and death that are robbing me of one of my favorite friends, his wife of her husband, his children of their Dad and him of the rest of his life.
--- The things I will never again pick up for the rest of MY life and I will attempt to slap out of the mouth of every person I know and love.
--- The things I will never again pick up for the rest of MY life and I will attempt to slap out of the mouth of every person I know and love.
--- Cigarettes, What ignorant people in all their infinite wisdom refer to when they say "I know they're gonna kill me and I don't give a fuck." Yeah asshole? Well, you're mother gives a fuck, your friends give a fuck, your children, your sister, and when the day comes and cancer is rotting away your insides and your life and you're clinging desperately on for a cure YOU TOO WILL GIVE A FUCK!
by Sarah Beane May 6, 2008