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HLP

HLP is an acronym for Heterosexual Life Partner. HLPs are same-gender butt buddies/soulmates/biffles in life. Either half of a HLP pair could be single or taken; relationship status does not matter as the HLP bond is greater than what can be described in words.

If the HLP pair were to turn non-hetero, they would probably get married in a heartbeat. However, if only one half of the HLP pair turns non-hetero, it will potentially make things mighty awkward palmtree.
Scheduling all HLP events via Outlook, including but not limited to:

Going on lunch/dinner/brunch/happy hour dates, playing wingman/wingwoman, going on vacations together at least 3x a year, saying/thinking/doing the same things, being crazy fans of team/places that you do not actually like/live in together, indulging in each other's vices (i.e. shopping, eating, drinking), obsessing over people who should not be obsessed over but are allowed to be because you are HLPs and no one else understands each other like you do, referencing each other on Yelp reviews.
by DJ Iron Jellyroll October 19, 2011
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HLP

HLP stand for Her Loss Program in a masculine sense. An individual automatically falls into the HLP regime due to a recent break-up, a cheating wife, or some other significant life change involving a woman.
"Bro, you just chugged a 4loko and maxed your bench press, that's HLP as fuck."
by JonApple October 19, 2023
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Related Words
HLP HLP Syndrome hlpe HLPH hlpos h@lp

HLP

House League Phenomenon: A hockey player who should be playing high school or midget major hockey, but decides to run train in house league hockey, with learn to skate teammates.
Scrub 1: Dude are we going to lose again today?
Scrub 2: Hell no, HLP is finally going to show up to roll house
by LTrightwing57 February 9, 2010
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HLP Syndrome

HLP Syndrome, also knows as Humongously Large Penis Syndrome, affects approximately .001% of the male population on Earth. It can cause uterine encroachment in female partners which can be severely painful. Due to this, individuals diagnosed with HLP Syndrome have a harder time staying in relationships once partners experience this syndrome. The month of June has officially been declared HLP Awareness Month.
When I was traveling from BNA to TPA, I got pulled out of line by security and I had to embarrassingly explain to them about my HLP Syndrome as they thought I was carrying an unexploded ordnance in my pants.
by Lauuson December 9, 2022
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h@lp

please help there is someone trying to kill me
(its my depression)
by MEMER!@1234567890 April 2, 2019
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hlpos

the brakes on this car is a hlpos
by some dude in utah August 21, 2006
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HLPH

Here Little Pig Here (HLPH)

Pronounced like health, but sounds like Hell-F.

When 5 or more Male Piglets form a ring and use an index finger to insert copious amounts of narcotics into each other's Anus.

Fun Fact: When junior cops(piglets)confiscate illegal drugs from victims in raids, the majority of the time they pocket the drugs and use them at the spit-roast(police only party)
"hey, Kaotic, come to the bathroom with Tommy, Luke, Jamie and I, and HLPH us

"say less, Dave"
by KongSolo July 19, 2022
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