a religion for people who were either brainwashed as children, ignorant, dumb as hell, or afraid to believe that maybe there isn't a god always looking out for you. And many of them are in denial about the millions of people that have been tortured and killed over it. The truth hurts, doesn't it?
by your soon to be ruler August 10, 2005
Christianity is a monotheisic religion that originated from Judaism. There are many denomiations of Christianity and every one of them is different. You have the up-tight Baptists, The guilt-ridden Catholics, the laid-back Methodists, and the very loose Episcopals (my denomiation). It is pretty ignorant to say that all Christians are close-minded and/or hateful. This is untrue for true christians are accepting and try to be loving like Christ.
Examples of the denominations of christianity:
Baptist Prayer-"Lord Almighty, I have sinned badly and please spare me from eternal damnation!"
Catholic Prayer-"Our Mother of Perpetual Sorrow, I am a terrible sinful person, I know i deserve to burn for stealing my neighbor's garden gnome, Please Forgive Me!"
Methodist Prayer-"Well, Let's see here, I sinned pretty bad so how about we just forget about it and star off new."
Episcopal Prayer-"Oh yeah, I'm sorry i passed out on the street after winning the tequila contest. Also, I think I should add a MY BAD for punching George in my drunken rage but George was annoying the hell out of me"
Baptist Prayer-"Lord Almighty, I have sinned badly and please spare me from eternal damnation!"
Catholic Prayer-"Our Mother of Perpetual Sorrow, I am a terrible sinful person, I know i deserve to burn for stealing my neighbor's garden gnome, Please Forgive Me!"
Methodist Prayer-"Well, Let's see here, I sinned pretty bad so how about we just forget about it and star off new."
Episcopal Prayer-"Oh yeah, I'm sorry i passed out on the street after winning the tequila contest. Also, I think I should add a MY BAD for punching George in my drunken rage but George was annoying the hell out of me"
by Jadali April 27, 2008
One of the world's dominant religions, combining the philosophy of the Greeks with pagan practices and the moral rigor of Judaism, centered around the teachings of Jesus (Yeshua).
Christian theology has ingeniously solved the dilemma of mercy and justice and provided the basis for equality before the law, appreciation of science and education, and the addition of a moral basis to political structures, and the truest rationale for human rights.
Many of the ant-christian intellectual elite would like us to believe, however, that before Christianity, mankind lived a peaceful and idyllic existence without corruption, bigotry, or warfare.
Christian theology has ingeniously solved the dilemma of mercy and justice and provided the basis for equality before the law, appreciation of science and education, and the addition of a moral basis to political structures, and the truest rationale for human rights.
Many of the ant-christian intellectual elite would like us to believe, however, that before Christianity, mankind lived a peaceful and idyllic existence without corruption, bigotry, or warfare.
by Killing Kittens December 3, 2004
by Dirge February 14, 2005
The reason we don't all fly spaceships and explore the galaxy like in Futurama. A cult that should be re-named Analanity. The faster we get rid of these people the faster we can live in a technology driven Utopia.
Insane Christian: Excuse me sir, do you have a moment to talk about our Lord Jesus Christ?
Unsuspecting Victim: Only if you stop speaking out of your anus.
Christianity..
Unsuspecting Victim: Only if you stop speaking out of your anus.
Christianity..
by phenixer May 31, 2013
The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...
Person1: I attend a pseudocannibalistic ritual every Sunday.
Person2: You must be a follower of Christianity.
Person1: You are correct.
Person2: You must be a follower of Christianity.
Person1: You are correct.
by SoCalTeen December 22, 2006