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government employee 

in fact I don't do dick all day, I'm busy typing this shit in urban dictionary when I should be working, (I mean taking a coffee break, smoke break, etc.
Man is it time to go home yet, my ass is getting soar from sitting here all day.

employee of the month 

An uncaring individual of a retail or customer service establishment who has no interest whatsoever in helping you.

Always there when you don't need them, and never around when you do.
Oh great, now I have to track down the employee of the month to get one of these stereos.

fellow employee 

Fellow Employee---Dumb ass microcephalics you have to put up with while you try to do your job.
I could finish this job if only my fellow employees would stay the fuck out of the way!
fellow employee by vernon dutton January 20, 2004

air employee 

Someone who gets paid to stand around. They have little to no effect on the company's operations.
"What is your role at the company?"
"Mostly nothing."
"Air employee, noice."
air employee by 1Head April 23, 2017

National Throw a Crab at a McDonalds Employee Day 

December 17th is National Throw a Crab at a McDonalds Employee Day. This is the one day of the year where it will be socially acceptable to throw a crab at a McDonald’s employee. Gender of crab is not of importance but please no female crabs.
Quote 1 - DeMarcus: come with me to get some crabs from the fish market! they’re on sale today for only $6 each!
Jamal: oh ya! I forgot it was National Throw a Crab at a McDonalds Employee Day!

Quote 2 - McDonalds Employee: Hey! What do you think you’re doing!?
Jamal: Look at the date, dumbass!
McDonalds Employee: oh ya I forgot it was National Throw a Crab at a McDonalds Employee Day! My bad!

Self-employed 

working for oneself
I work for mself I'm self-employed
Self-employed by Marlooo June 20, 2019