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Paralysis

The collective noun for a group of gatekeepers in any large organization, especially government. Typically range from policy-quoting front-line workers up to middle managers with no hope of promotion.
"My proposal was well received by anyone I spoke to about it, but now it's been stymied by a paralysis of bureaucrats."
by Dudge September 23, 2022
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Simp Paralysis

Very horrible. It is diagnosed when you have simped too hard online and in public! The only cure is to REDACTED.
Bro, I heard that Jeremy got diagnosed with Simp Paralysis.
by UnoKage June 9, 2020
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phone paralysis

The complete inability to think or speak that some people get when their phone call is answered by someone other than the person they tried to ring.

They seem so stunned by the fact that someone they called might momentarily be away from their desk, that they had never thought of a way to deal with such an eventuality.
John's colleague: "Hello, John Smith's phone.................Hello?

Caller: "......er, hi.......er........is John not there?...."

John's colleague: "No, he's not about right now, can I take a message or something?"

Caller: "Er....er....yeah, can you ask him to call James at Acme? He's got my number"

John's colleague: "Will do, thanks.........(hangs up).....Jeez that dude had real phone paralysis!
by Urban Englander June 20, 2009
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agency paralysis

The inability to act on one's own behalf. A mental freeze when it comes to taking positive actions, initiating projects, or moving forward with existing projects.
My older brother, suffering from a bad case of agency paralysis, couldn't move out of his apartment into the better and cheaper one he was offered.
by lexicalibc December 26, 2017
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Leaden Paralysis

being depressed to the point that you feel as if your limbs are weighted down
Joe: After Jane broke up with Jason he said he didn't feel like he could get off his couch for days.
Tom: Oh, yeah sounds like a classic case of leaden paralysis.
by tom_humdrum July 28, 2021
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Sleep Paralysis Demon

A Sleep Paralysis Demon is that scary shi that watches you sleep while asking for breakfast or for something to do because ho u slacking on that breakfast and entertainment, that scary shi might just eat your toes off while you sleep.
(This is definitely not your Sleep Paralysis Demon.)
You: Damn, I can’t move or speak… this shi tuff.. wonder what it is. Oh it’s a Sleep Paralysis Demon… makes sense.

Sleep Paralysis Demon: Hey pookie, so I’m your new Sleep Paralysis Demon! Make me food, please! I beg of you. I could eat you, but I won’t if you feed me food :3
by ASleepParalysisDemon July 17, 2025
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douche paralysis

Becoming physically paralyzed by an utterly douchey remark or conversation.
Person 1: "Are you overhearing the conversation about Malbec wine coming from the table behind us?"

Person 2: "Yes. It's enough to send me into douche paralysis."
by Schnitzel Procurement Manager December 23, 2024
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