A word people use because they like deceiving themselves to believe we live in a Utopia.
Mostly they're used by organizations and "considerate" people who don't want to offend the "situationally disturbed" citizens.
George Carlin, a comedian, did a great schpiel about euphemisms once. (A few of the following examples are in his speech.)
You should read it. It may not "open your eyes," but you'll realize how much we like to disguise our speech and blind ourselves. Disguising a condition with nicer, longer words doesn't change the fact that you still have the condition. Sorry.
(Note: Not all examples {e.g. black/white} are "conditions" or negative at all}
Mostly they're used by organizations and "considerate" people who don't want to offend the "situationally disturbed" citizens.
George Carlin, a comedian, did a great schpiel about euphemisms once. (A few of the following examples are in his speech.)
You should read it. It may not "open your eyes," but you'll realize how much we like to disguise our speech and blind ourselves. Disguising a condition with nicer, longer words doesn't change the fact that you still have the condition. Sorry.
(Note: Not all examples {e.g. black/white} are "conditions" or negative at all}
IMO, There's nothing wrong with most of the following conditions; they just warrant a euphemism because society can't accept reality. Many are unavoidable.
I just call 'em like I see em.
Nobody:
is old, they're elderly senior citizens.
is gay, they're homosexual.
is poor, they're in poverty.
is black, they're African American.
is white, they're Caucasian.
is fat, they're obese.
is a slut, they're promiscuous.
is crippled, they're handicapped.
is deaf, they're hearing impaired.
is blind, they're visually impaired.
is retarded, they're mentally challenged.
is short, they're vertically challenged.
is stupid, they're academically challenged.
I could go on.
I just call 'em like I see em.
Nobody:
is old, they're elderly senior citizens.
is gay, they're homosexual.
is poor, they're in poverty.
is black, they're African American.
is white, they're Caucasian.
is fat, they're obese.
is a slut, they're promiscuous.
is crippled, they're handicapped.
is deaf, they're hearing impaired.
is blind, they're visually impaired.
is retarded, they're mentally challenged.
is short, they're vertically challenged.
is stupid, they're academically challenged.
I could go on.
by ~The Nameless One~ October 12, 2005
Host--Hey, welcome to the bonfire. You bring your share?
Guest--Here's a semister's worth of psychology notes.
Host-Sweet. KILL IT WITH FIRE!
Guest--Here's a semister's worth of psychology notes.
Host-Sweet. KILL IT WITH FIRE!
by ~The Nameless One~ July 22, 2006
Nature's favorite form of torture. It smells wonderful, but tastes FUCKING AWFUL by itself. This means you experience and desire great tastes, but don't actually get to satisfy your want. Quench your need. Make you happy. Oh no, you can only smell and wish.
(While some coffee is like this in the fact that it smells better than it tastes, vanilla smells better than any coffee I've ever smelled. Vanilla > You.)
It's also the most common ice cream flavor.
(While some coffee is like this in the fact that it smells better than it tastes, vanilla smells better than any coffee I've ever smelled. Vanilla > You.)
It's also the most common ice cream flavor.
*Man first discovered vanilla*
Hmmm... this smell good. *drinks* ... *spits out* MAN, THIS TASTE LIKE SHIT!
Why, WHY does this odor torture me so?
The scent fills my nose with wonderful thoughts... yet my mouth lacks the same feeling. *cries*
Hmmm... this smell good. *drinks* ... *spits out* MAN, THIS TASTE LIKE SHIT!
Why, WHY does this odor torture me so?
The scent fills my nose with wonderful thoughts... yet my mouth lacks the same feeling. *cries*
by ~The Nameless One~ May 16, 2005
Something to be rejoiced. Sure it hurts when it's somebody close, but if nobody died, but people were born, it would get overcrowded, and really suck. If nobody died and nobody was born, in all probability you wouldn't exist, and you are certainly limited to your current family. Eternally.
To fear it is irrational, and a waste of your finite, limited, short time.
To fear it is irrational, and a waste of your finite, limited, short time.
If you are, death is not.
If death is, you are not.
"Why should I fear that which cannot exist when I do?"
Epicuris
If death is, you are not.
"Why should I fear that which cannot exist when I do?"
Epicuris
by ~The Nameless One~ September 20, 2005
A really funny way to type oh nos, which is a sarcastic and mocking way of saying oh no.
Because, when you pronounce oh nos, it sounds like, "oh Nose"
Like the anatomy part. So it's kinda funny. Get it? Got it? Good.
Because, when you pronounce oh nos, it sounds like, "oh Nose"
Like the anatomy part. So it's kinda funny. Get it? Got it? Good.
OMG, FREAK OUT, I LEFT MY *insert personal & embarassing item here.* AT *insert friend*'S PLACE!!!1111oneonetwo
*Insert sarcastic remark* (Hint: Look at the word you're looking up)
So it looks like:
OMG, FREAK OUT, I LEFT VIBRATOR AT JIM'S PLACE!!!1111oneonetwo
OH NOSE!
*Insert sarcastic remark* (Hint: Look at the word you're looking up)
So it looks like:
OMG, FREAK OUT, I LEFT VIBRATOR AT JIM'S PLACE!!!1111oneonetwo
OH NOSE!
by ~The Nameless One~ September 26, 2005
If normal society refers to a Canine lupus familiaris as "dog," and the reverse of a Canine lupus familiaris is the way we spell our Lord, surely our African American friends, who call a Canine lupus familiaris a "dawg," worship a Gwad?
Just food for thought.
Just food for thought.
by ~The Nameless One~ June 26, 2005
In kindergarten, a relaxation period you can't truly appreciate until years later, when you desperately wish there was said period of nap time in your schedule.
Kindergarteners: Awww. it's nap time again! I HATE nap time!
High schoolers: More fucking homework? Whatever happened to nap time?
High schoolers: More fucking homework? Whatever happened to nap time?
by ~The Nameless One~ July 15, 2005