7 definitions by woodchipper

sweatering

The act of hovering so close to your friend in a bar that you appear to be his sweater, which inadvertently keeps women from approaching the group.

Those chicks were looking hard, but Jimmy was sweatering me so they moved on.

by woodchipper May 19, 2008

snubble

a woman's painful and abrasive 1-4 day pubic hair growth after her vagina has been shaved.

Bob agreed to bang Jill again, even though last time he got a nasty rash from Jill's snubble right over the top of his schween.

by woodchipper May 19, 2008

metalhead basketball

1. Any individual or group physical task performed awkwardly or without athleticism and with total disregard for the safety of others.
2. A complete and utter fiasco.

Watching Joe try to install his new countertops was total metalhead basketball. Not only were they crooked, but he dropped them on Tommy's fingers.

by woodchipper June 29, 2008

hot hangover

A mental disorder suffered by moderate looking to unattractive women who were very attractive less than five years earlier. Onset of this disease usually occurs between the ages of 24-28 and can last well into the 40's. The disease is marked by an overinflated sense of one's looks, accompanied by a standoffish attitude.

"Who does that gloopy mess think she is? Don't get me wrong, I'd still hit it, but she must think she looks the same as she did in college. That chubby, crow's feet having bitch has a bad case of hot hangover"

by woodchipper April 18, 2008

red pillow

A males attempt to engage in a threesome by bringing a red pillow into the room where his friend and a girl are having sex.

"When Joe came into the room holding his red pillow, I knew it was time to pull my pants up."

by woodchipper April 16, 2008

pubic apology

The verbal regret a woman makes for having pubic hair, and for you having discovered it.

Bob- "Lets get these pants down."
Random- "Im so sorry, I dont like to completely shave"
Bob- "No need for a pubic apology, I hate snubble irritation

by woodchipper June 11, 2008

poon-trenching

The act of settling for the first girl (often grotesque) that speaks to you at a bar, with total disregard for the potential to achieve more attractive suitors. See also Vaginal Complacency

Joe's poon-trenching reached an all time high when he stood patronizing the 240 lb woman in the throwback Bullets jersey not 5 minutes after entering the bar.

by woodchipper April 29, 2008