vulvahammer's definitions

schlong fondler

one who fondles schlong(s)

everyone who watches american idol is a total schlong fondler.

by vulvahammer May 28, 2010

ugly parrot

a sexual move that involves sneaking up behind a girl and laying your junk on her shoulder and squawking like a parrot in a loud and obnoxious tone.

My girlfriend was typing a paper last night and it was the perfect opportunity to whip my junk out, perch it on her shoulder and squawk like a parrot. Hence, the ugly parrot.

by vulvahammer October 22, 2009

douche musket

1. a term that is applicable when douche nozzle does not accurately describe the person or people in question.
2. an awesome fucking name to call people.

dude1: you see that queaf with his popped collar??
dude2: yeah, what a douche musket.

by vulvahammer November 22, 2009