as hot as Arizona asphalt and twice as thick

The way to describe a girl who has heavenly curves that are twice as thick as the normal girl and her intellect is too which can lead to misleading her into some pleasureful activities for both parties. (Arizona and some other states have thicker amounts of asphalt on their roads due to high temperatures.)

Darrin: The new girl at work is something else. She's round in all the right places! She's an all-a-round girl!
Bob: Oh, you mean Shandi? She sure gets my attention!
Darrin: Yep. Mang! I'd like to spend some time alone with her.
Andy: I've talked to her a few times. She's dumb. I think I could talk her into doing some things. Wonderful things!
Darrin: So, you're telling me she's as hot as Arizona asphalt and twice as thick?
Andy: Being from Needles, I can firmly state that to be true!

by von groovy June 20, 2017

lotsa notsa

Something you say to explain that nothing happened when you wished it would have.

Derek: Hey, Shane!! How was it with Shandi? Was it wowza??
Shane: Lotsa notsa, man. Lotsa notsa...

by von groovy August 26, 2017

photohalf

When people post an obviously edited photograph of them with their ex cropped out.

Doll: Did you see what Sheila had posted last Thursday?
Dame: Yep, I recognized it. It was a total photohalf from when she was with Kurdt.
Doll: Me too - I took it!

by von groovy May 16, 2017

Emotional Lotion

The secretions that are created by sexual stimulation and amorous emotions. These secretions facilitate lubrication for lust and love to coexist in what some may call a center of carnality which compels parties to the state of bliss.

Khloe was telling Lindsay all about her good time last night and Lindsay was overwhelmed with all of the details. Lindsay was very nervous to ask specifics but did offer suggestions on how to remove the emotional lotion stains that were on the sofa. Khloe laughed and stated, "They are stayin'! Those show that I got mine!" Lindsay dryly replied, "Well, I'm not sittin' on that thing again."

by von groovy June 13, 2024

chewed tobacco ass

this is the nasty smelling, gross feeling, and chewed tobacco ass appearing that happens when you start sweating and it's obvious you didn't wipe it clean

When the sun was blaring at 99 degrees and he really started sweating, Sean knew he had chewed tobacco ass and regretted wearing yellow shorts

by von groovy April 11, 2019

who named me?

This is something that people say when they discover that someone has insulted them when they were not present. This is usually said prior to the insulted instructing the offending party to "keep my name outta your mouth!"

Sammy: "Hey! Did you hear what Paulie said about you last weekend at the Grind?"
Kelly: "What? Who named me? Paulie? He's gonna regret open separating his smile!"
Sammy: "He's a trick. No one believes him anyway. Now let's go get our library cards."

by von groovy August 29, 2024

hey, you know that song by that faggot?

Something homophobes say as a pick-up line to other homophobes as code to hook-up

I was at this truck stop standing near the pay showers when I heard this one trucker say to another, "hey, you know that song by that faggot?" I just grabbed my Code Red and Corn Nuts and went back to my car before I heard the answer.

by von groovy February 21, 2019