theinstigator's definitions
one who reneges (backs out) on a promise he will go down on a woman (perform
cunnilingus, eat pussy.) This type of person is highly scorned by females.
cunnilingus, eat pussy.) This type of person is highly scorned by females.
Helen: So how was the date with Ted?
Janice: Could have went better. He told me he'd go down on me if I gave him a
blowjob first. But as soon as I did, he- all of a sudden- had to leave.
Helen: You need to drop his ass. He's a cunnilinquint!
Janice: Could have went better. He told me he'd go down on me if I gave him a
blowjob first. But as soon as I did, he- all of a sudden- had to leave.
Helen: You need to drop his ass. He's a cunnilinquint!
by theinstigator January 16, 2014
Get the cunnilinquint mug.the residue left on one's face after performing a nice sloppy job of cunnilingus. The "glaze" would be all across and above the upper lip, down the edges of the mouth and completely covering the whole front of the chin.
After Delilah had her orgasm, Fred lifted his mouth from between her legs. She raised her head from the pillow and saw he was grinning at her. She smiled with satisfaction and found it quite charming how his glaze goatee glistened in the candlelight.
by theinstigator December 30, 2013
Get the glaze goatee mug.a woman's hair arranged at the back of her head, held together with a band and to be used by a man as a handle while receiving oral sex from a willing female.
A straight ponytail is grasped near the base in a male's fist, medium grip. This allows nice control of the female's head, but is limiting due to awkward bending of the male's wrist. It is a carpal tunnel syndrome hazard for men who receive a high volume of blowjobs. The height of the ponytail on the back of the woman's head can be adjusted for better torque.
Another type of ponytail is the balled ponytail. The straight ponytail is simply folded under itself and tucked back into the band, resembling a ball of hair. Grasped with an open palm, the fingers should meet at the band, thus the "ball" is contained in the man's hand. Called the "palm sander" grip, it allows full control of the woman's head with no wrist strain.
A third type of ponytail is the double ponytail. Two tails are formed toward the rear left and right sides of the female's head. A favorite among bikers as each tail can be grasped by a separate hand. The willing lady's head is steered like a motorcycle.
Caution: though clearly sexual stimuli for men, it is important for men to remember women do not always view it in the same context. Women often use ponytails just to keep hair out of their faces. The confused male should never just assume when a woman's hair is in a ponytail her head is ready for mounting. He should always ask first.
A straight ponytail is grasped near the base in a male's fist, medium grip. This allows nice control of the female's head, but is limiting due to awkward bending of the male's wrist. It is a carpal tunnel syndrome hazard for men who receive a high volume of blowjobs. The height of the ponytail on the back of the woman's head can be adjusted for better torque.
Another type of ponytail is the balled ponytail. The straight ponytail is simply folded under itself and tucked back into the band, resembling a ball of hair. Grasped with an open palm, the fingers should meet at the band, thus the "ball" is contained in the man's hand. Called the "palm sander" grip, it allows full control of the woman's head with no wrist strain.
A third type of ponytail is the double ponytail. Two tails are formed toward the rear left and right sides of the female's head. A favorite among bikers as each tail can be grasped by a separate hand. The willing lady's head is steered like a motorcycle.
Caution: though clearly sexual stimuli for men, it is important for men to remember women do not always view it in the same context. Women often use ponytails just to keep hair out of their faces. The confused male should never just assume when a woman's hair is in a ponytail her head is ready for mounting. He should always ask first.
Greg: Hey, Betsy, I noticed from the water cooler you put your hair into a ponytail. Would you like to give me a blowjob?
Betsy: Fuck off, Dickwad!
Greg: Oh. Okay, maybe later, then.
Betsy: Fuck off, Dickwad!
Greg: Oh. Okay, maybe later, then.
by theinstigator December 18, 2013
Get the ponytail mug.Having one’s right hand in one person’s ass and the left hand in another person’s ass and hitting the right nerves to force them into a humorous conversation preferably to entertain others. A young Marquis de Sade used to practice this at dinner parties in Paris much to the delight of his sexually deviant party guests. It is speculated that this is where the term “talking out of one’s ass” was derived from.
A large balding man is slouched over with his pants down to his knees and next to him is a young maiden of twenty-one years of age who is on her hands and knees with the bottom of her dress pulled up to her waist. The one and only Marquis de Sade is positioned behind the two, a hand buried in each ass.
Jacques, the butler: Ladies and gentlemen, the Human Puppet Show!
(Thunderous applause)
Maiden: Ohh, ahhhhh, Knock, Knock!
Balding man: Hmmph! Uhhn. Who…the …Fuuuck…ahhh…is there!?
Maiden: Eeeh! Ohh! ANITA!!!
Balding man: Ohhyeeooww! Anita fucking who!!??
Maiden: Uhhhmp…Ohhh! Anita fucking dick in me!
Laughter abounds from the crowd!
Jacques, the butler: Ladies and gentlemen, the Human Puppet Show!
(Thunderous applause)
Maiden: Ohh, ahhhhh, Knock, Knock!
Balding man: Hmmph! Uhhn. Who…the …Fuuuck…ahhh…is there!?
Maiden: Eeeh! Ohh! ANITA!!!
Balding man: Ohhyeeooww! Anita fucking who!!??
Maiden: Uhhhmp…Ohhh! Anita fucking dick in me!
Laughter abounds from the crowd!
by theinstigator October 18, 2016
Get the Human Puppet Show mug.Dr. Viktrov, the scientist: (unzipping his pants) Do you know, Natasia, a single sperm contains about 37.5 mb of DNA information? This means that the average male ejaculate would represent a data transfer of approximately 1,587 gb in about 3 seconds.
Natasia, the lab assistant: (kneeling and taking the chewing gum from her mouth and sticking it to the bottom of the table) That's a lot of information to swallow, Doctor!
Natasia, the lab assistant: (kneeling and taking the chewing gum from her mouth and sticking it to the bottom of the table) That's a lot of information to swallow, Doctor!
by theinstigator March 13, 2014
Get the data transfer mug.A shit taken in someone's car usually in an act of revenge or defiance. Often left as a message in a poorly parked car.
Terrell played lookout while Juan took a shit the size of an axe handle in the back seat of Benny's Cadillac. When Juan finished Terrell looked in and said, "Mutha fuck! That is one big ass Detroit Burrito!"
They laughed as they left and Juan turned back one last time and yelled, "Welcome to Dee-fuckin-troit, bitch!"
They laughed as they left and Juan turned back one last time and yelled, "Welcome to Dee-fuckin-troit, bitch!"
by theinstigator October 2, 2016
Get the Detroit Burrito mug.When one is engaged in anal sex and as they are thrusting in and out of their partner's anus they look down and notice some shit on their dick. Suddenly the energy and desire for anal sex is diminished greatly to the point of becoming semi-erect.
Jim: Dude, I so pumped last night. I had a hard-on that wouldn't quit and I was fucking Jane's ass. Then I noticed my cock was coming out dirty and I just lost it. Started going limp. Lost my drive. What a bummer.
Bo: Damn, bro. Total brown out!
Bo: Damn, bro. Total brown out!
by theinstigator September 22, 2016
Get the Brown Out mug.