ted's definitions

grow a tail

To simulate a kangaroo, or other large marsupial, by bending over and releasing a long blind baby seal from your cake hole.

(At the end of a large dinner).
"Where are you going with that magazine, Edward?"
"I'm off to meditate and grow a tail"

by Ted May 7, 2003

whizzle

a white nizzle

by ted May 23, 2003

mo

a skinny piece of garbage who cannot get laid, see also rapist or stalker.

The mo could not get laid so he stalked and then raped a girl.

by ted June 13, 2003

Martha Stewart

1) 21st century entrepreneur whose failed personal life spawned a successful career in life style television.

2) An act of defecation related revenge. When thoroughly aggravated by a friend or loved one, discreetly remove a towel or sheet from the bottom of their linen closet. Carefully unfold said article, take a hearty steaming shit, refold to conceal fecal surprise, and replace at the bottom of the pile. Typically the "Martha Stewart" is not discovered until the entire closet smells like a Tijuana whorehouse.

1) I hope the SEC violates Martha Stewart in the ass with a lead pipe for her insider trading.

2) The guy working at the GAP was a real asshole so I pulled a "Martha Stewart" on a pair of jeans out on display near the counter he was working. I folded and replaced them, so I hope he has a pleasant smelling afternoon.

by Ted June 16, 2003

the chief

whatever. any person who is chiefy-ish enough to actually create this definition is certainly the ultimate chief

yup. now what?

by ted June 22, 2003