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MTV

The motherfuckers who scrapped all the cool rock and hip-hopartists for non-singers like Eminem, Puff Daddy, Britney Spears, and Blink 182.
MTV might as well just call itself Karaoke Television (KTV).
by sarcastic February 24, 2003
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anthro

A word derived from the ancient Greek word "anthropos", which means HUMAN, having HUMAN characteristics, or relating to HUMAN.

It does NOT relate to lower-order animals.
Now how is it that these deluded furry fanatics use the word anthro to relate to talking animals? Haven't they ever taken Anthropology, or checked the fucking dictionary for the definition of anthro?
by sarcastic July 12, 2004
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Wal-Mart

One thing that pisses one off when buying anything at Wal-Mart is that only one or two checkout aisles are open, even during rush hour.

But on the bright side, Wal-Mart sells the latest computers dirt-cheap. All you have to do is uninstall Linux, throw away the CD, and install your favorite version of Windows, all for $399.99 or less.
At 2:30 in the morning, on my way back from a trip, I stopped at a local Wal-Mart to buy motor oil and coolant, and saw that the store was just as packed with frantic customers as it was at 2:30 in the afternoon. Yikes!
by sarcastic April 12, 2004
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Jar Jar Binks

He was basically responsible for Emperor Sideous Palpatine's rise to power because in Episode 2, he actually GAVE Palpatine the supreme power of waging war on any planet that dared to challenge the Republic. Unfortunately, in Episode 3, we will then see Palpatine turning against and crushing the Republic with the help of evil Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader. And we can all thank Jar Jar Binks for that.
Too bad we will never get to see Jar Jar Binks die a slow, horrible, and bloody death.
by sarcastic December 5, 2003
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Native American

A proud descendent of the first group of humans to settle in the Americas. According to recent archaelogical findings, they migrated from Asia via glacier bridges and sea travel more than 12,000 years ago and within a short time, they branched off into thousands of unique cultures. Sadly, the North American natives were nearly exterminated by greedy and gold-thirsty European settlers who tricked them through the use of treaties, butchered entire cultures in the name of God, raped their women, stole their land, and infected them with smallpox, syphillis, and other deadly diseases. Today, what's left of the North American natives are now either drinking themselves to death on the reservations, or getting their sweet revenge by building casinos.

Although the South American natives were luckier than those of the north, they were mostly converted to Catholicism, forced to speak Spanish, and what little earnings they make are sent to the modern Roman capital known as the Vatican.
Today, the descendents of the European settlers add insult to injury by honoring a holiday called Thanksgiving, which basically celebrates how their ancestors ass-raped and culled back the once widespread Native American population.
by sarcastic November 27, 2003
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Windows

I still use Windows 98 beta. So far, I haven't seen this blue screen since last year, when I pulled the CD out during installation. Maybe I would have to be a code-writer or delete system files in order to see it.
Windows sucks, Linux sucks, MacOS sucks, life sucks. Just get over it and move on. Sheesh.
by sarcastic October 20, 2003
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Timeshare

See time share time-share.

An elaborate marketing scam designed to make victims purchase property that they don't really need. Typically this scam is used in vacation/resort towns like Williamsburg, Myrtle Beach, Las Vegas, and Orlando. After being lured to the places with offers of "Free Disney Tickets" or "Free Money", victims are made to endure a 90-120 minute sales presentation where they are shown around a series of semi-luxurious condos or apartments, and then persuaded to purchase a property using deceptive and highly-pressurized sales pitches.
After being shown around a fairly nice-looking apartment complex, the Timeshare salesman and the customer return to the main office to finalize the presentation.

Timeshare Rep: So, did you like the Quazi Glam properties?
Customer: Absolutely! The jacuzzi room was a nice touch, and the ocean view is spectacular.
Timeshare Rep: Now, I need to get my double-digit sales quota today, and I'm running terribly short on time, so let's get down to business. You said you are an Engineer, and you probably make like a shitload of money, so how would you like to purchase an apartment for $2,899 a month for 60 months?
Customer: Those apartments don't look like they cost that much!
Timeshare Rep: Aw come on now, work with me. (scribbles on a paper) Using a hooey mathematical formula I made up while showing you around, you can easily get one paid off in like, 14 months.
Customer: The price still does not justify the quality.
Timeshare Rep: Hmmm. How about I reduce the payment to $2,199 for 54 months. You can even invite your friends and relatives to rent it out and reduce your cost.
Customer: Let me think about it later.
Timeshare Rep: Okay. How about $1,799 for 48 months? I'll even throw in free maintenance and free lunches at the on-site bistro for 3 months.
Customer: I still need more time to consider this.
Timeshare Rep: You're breaking my balls here. $1,499 for 42 months, plus all of the benefits, and free heating?
Customer: Alright, fine. I'll buy an apartment.
Timeshare Rep: Great! Now sign on the dotted line before my 100 minute presentation is up (hands over a document).
Customer: (signng the document) Now what if I change my mind and decide to cancel my payment, do I get refunded?
Timeshare Rep: Um.....no. In fact, by signing up, you are now required to pay $2,899 up front, plus a $7,345 utility instalation fee, $13,500 pet-chauffer service, and a $1,766 asteroid-impact insurance fee.
Customer: Fuck.
Timeshare Rep: Thank you for purchasing a Quazi Glam property. Here's a complementary ticket to Jamal's Flea Market. Have a nice day. Sucker.
by sarcastic June 11, 2006
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