7 definitions by samweis

French Handshake

The accidental male to male contact which happens during double penetration

"Dude, what just happened there"
"I don't know man all I know is that we were fucking the shit out of her and we got locked into a French Handshake"
"I'm going to have to scrub my nuts for an hour after you did that bag work on me"
"I'm not worried about that so much as the eye contact...Bro never make eye contact!!!!

by samweis July 8, 2010

Mow-job

Any yard work performed with the promise of oral sex as compensation

Joe: "How much did you earn doing yard work today son"
Billy: "Only $20, but I was orally abused by the lady in the house down at the end of the street."
Joe: "Ah, nothing like the summer mow-job"

by samweis August 24, 2011

Pewnuonia

An upper respiratory tract inaction caused by breathing in other people's fecal material.

As she breathed in a solid 70/30% mixture of farts' to oxygen, Hillary looked down at the fly-over country which she so despised. Look at those bitter clingers she thought as she looked down on Elk County, Pa en-route to her appearance started the 9/11 memorial in DC. Hillary popped another Vitamin C supplement in hope that she did not develop a pewnuonia as a result of her confinement in the cigar tube that is an airplane cabin. Unfortunately, karma turned out to be a selfish bitch.

by samweis March 31, 2018

plarmf

the sound' when a complete-drunk either walks into a pole, wall, or parked car, and/or falls directly on his/her face when falling down.

As i was people watching along the boardwalk in Mission Beach, this completely drunk broad was walking and not watching where she was goin... ran right into a street sign, face first, then stumbled back n fell right on her face... 'plarmf' .

by samweis January 17, 2013

Tapping cloth

When you have to have a bowel movement soo bad that the shit is actually crowning out of your anus leaving a stain on your underwear

"Dude I have to shit soo bad I'm tapping cloth, if I wait much longer I'm going to be wearing the funny pants"

by samweis May 26, 2013

lose you bait

When engaged in a sexual act your condom slides off and you are forced to manually extract it from your partner (see hogging @ deep six)

lose you bait
Me: "Oh shit you won't believe it man, I was fucking Amy the other night and right after I busted I lose my bait"
Friend: "Dude! you "lost your bait" Sounds like you need to go aquaman on her ass"
Me:"Dude, You know I was hogging that shit for like a half hour"

by samweis January 11, 2009

Hogging

The act of manually removing a used condom from a partners oraface

I ended up hogging her pussy after my condom fell off

by samweis January 11, 2009