porkchchoppanzeefin's definitions

Voicemailed

Sent to voicemail.

Phone: "Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice messaging system."
Me: "Ahh, voicemailed again."
In unison: "At the tone, please record your message. When you are finished recording you may hang up or press 1 for more options. To leave a callback number, press 5. Beep."

by porkchchoppanzeefin June 22, 2019

Fuck Bestie

A fuck buddy who is also your best friend, but you aren't dating for some stupid reason.

Charlie: Hey, how are things with Mazie?
Matthew: Not great. She broke up with me last week because she wants "freedom" and now we're fuck besties.

by porkchchoppanzeefin June 2, 2020

Impediman

A form of manspreading in which one obliviously stands or walks in someone's way. Typically a behavior attributed to white men.

Two white guys are standing at the bottom of the staircase talking. Jen and Alex try to get down the stairs.

Jen: Impedimanning.
Alex: What do we do?
Jen: We just push through and act like its our fault.

The two push through and say sorry. Neither impediman notices.

by porkchchoppanzeefin May 23, 2018

Break the bed in

When you fuck on a bed for the first time

Hey, it's great to be here in New York for a visit! Can you show us the guest room? Dina and I are going to get unpacked and break the bed in.

by porkchchoppanzeefin September 29, 2021

Ѿ

A tattoo above the butt.

Gary: Damn, she has a nice Ѿ!
Marcus: Hell yah!

by porkchchoppanzeefin October 14, 2011

Bioless

Going on a dating app and only using pictures to attract a potential mate.

Denise: Hey Sam, why don't you have a bio on your Tinder?

Sam: I prefer going bioless. My bios always sound cheesy.

by porkchchoppanzeefin April 10, 2021

birthday unfriend

To partake in a systematic unfriending of people on FaceBook on their birthdays.

Lisa: "I've got to wish these 8 people a happy birthday. But if I birthday unfriend, I only have to do 5."

by porkchchoppanzeefin November 27, 2018