J.R.: "Yes, that's right. Divert the entire pension fund into my personal account. It's not embezzling. It's a surefire investment. I'm invezzling. I mean, this is America. This is barely illegal."
by natalie portmanteaux November 02, 2021
J.R.: "Yes, that's right. Divert the entire pension fund into my personal account. It's not embezzling. It's a surefire investment. I'm invezzling. I mean, this is America. This is barely illegal. Fucking tight-ass."
by natalie portmanteaux November 05, 2021
Bob: “What are you doing here? Are you making another documentary?”
Randy: “No. Filmmaking was just a hobbytunity for me.”
Bob: “And now you own a food truck? How can you afford this?”
Randy: “Hmm... I have my ways, Bob. One of those ways is that I have an inheritance from my grandfather. You'll be able to read all about my food trucking journey in my blook.”
Linda: “What's a "blook"?”
Gene: “A blonde cook.”
Tina: “Blooks have more fun.”
Randy: “No. It's a blog I'm writing that I'm turning into a book. And the probably a bloovie.”
Bob: “You-you can't take two words and make them into one stupider word, Randy.”
Randy: “Well, Bob, now you're not invited to the blemiere.”
Randy: “No. Filmmaking was just a hobbytunity for me.”
Bob: “And now you own a food truck? How can you afford this?”
Randy: “Hmm... I have my ways, Bob. One of those ways is that I have an inheritance from my grandfather. You'll be able to read all about my food trucking journey in my blook.”
Linda: “What's a "blook"?”
Gene: “A blonde cook.”
Tina: “Blooks have more fun.”
Randy: “No. It's a blog I'm writing that I'm turning into a book. And the probably a bloovie.”
Bob: “You-you can't take two words and make them into one stupider word, Randy.”
Randy: “Well, Bob, now you're not invited to the blemiere.”
by natalie portmanteaux September 29, 2023
Mr. PB: "I'd feel awful if this great idea fell apart because we got distracted by something else, as we are often wont to do."
Todd: "Wait did you say feel awful or falafel?"
Mr. PB: "I said, ‘Feel awful,’ but tell me more about this falafel idea."
Todd: "Falafel or fawaffle?"
Mr. PB: "What!"
Todd: "Wait did you say feel awful or falafel?"
Mr. PB: "I said, ‘Feel awful,’ but tell me more about this falafel idea."
Todd: "Falafel or fawaffle?"
Mr. PB: "What!"
by natalie portmanteaux June 15, 2021
Nick: I thought you guys were at a cool high school party.
Val: We did make an appearance, grabbed some tit. That part was rad. But when you get to be our age, you'll see those parties, they're full of fakers, they're full of skanks.
Andrew: Would you two care to play some "Hooker Killer: Vatican City" with us?
Kurt: Game's for babies. You guys want to see some real sex?
Nick: We already saw your neighbors.
Val: We're talking about one of the greatest pornographic works in the history of skinema. It stars the Italian Stallion himself, Mr. Sylvester Stallone.
Maury: Oh, that's my buddy Frank's brother.
Val: Did it before he was famous.
Kurt: Just a struggling actor with a thick, meaty cock.
Val: We did make an appearance, grabbed some tit. That part was rad. But when you get to be our age, you'll see those parties, they're full of fakers, they're full of skanks.
Andrew: Would you two care to play some "Hooker Killer: Vatican City" with us?
Kurt: Game's for babies. You guys want to see some real sex?
Nick: We already saw your neighbors.
Val: We're talking about one of the greatest pornographic works in the history of skinema. It stars the Italian Stallion himself, Mr. Sylvester Stallone.
Maury: Oh, that's my buddy Frank's brother.
Val: Did it before he was famous.
Kurt: Just a struggling actor with a thick, meaty cock.
by natalie portmanteaux July 04, 2023
Snow-how, a portmanteau of snow and know-how, is the knowledge and skill utilized during snow and inclement weather.
"Right. So these European settlers, who were total ding-dongs, came in the dead of winter, with zero snow-how. These underprepared vacationers turned to eating each other to survive. Eventually, though, they realized they were surrounded by scores of edible fish and wildlife." ~ Nick Offerman as Beef Tobin
by natalie portmanteaux March 29, 2021
Archer: "I've changed, Lana."
Lana: "Please, you're halfway to half in the bag, as usual. Walkin' around in your... Why are you in your Spreefs?"
Archer: "They compliment my active lifestyle?"
Lana: "Please, you're halfway to half in the bag, as usual. Walkin' around in your... Why are you in your Spreefs?"
Archer: "They compliment my active lifestyle?"
by natalie portmanteaux May 14, 2021