7 definitions by mikebellman

opt out

Choosing to end one's own life for moral, ethical or legal reasons. A person faced with certain death after a horrible accident, crippling debts, impending imprisonment to name a few. Essentially suicide using one's own moral compass instead of desperation or depression as the typical vector of suicide cases.

Having been indicted on over a dozen felonies, Mr. Swartz exercised what power he had over the course of his own life and chose to 'opt out'.

by mikebellman January 23, 2013

VaJayJAIDS

The condition of contracting HIV (Human Immunodeficiency Virus) through heterosexual contact. Often when it's the result of straight extra-marital affairs from either partner in an otherwise monogamous relationship.

"How in the world did Dave get HIV? He's married 8 years now!"
"Remember that trip his wife took to Vegas? 'VaJayJAIDS' from a random fark"

by mikebellman July 14, 2012

Pookemon Go

The act of playing 'Pokemon Go' while using a public toilet. Since you're indoors, sorting your pokemon, catching pokemon, or (s)wiping the same PokeStop while you squeeze out a Poodgeot

Dang... Bill just got a Meowth playing Pookemon Go at Shitpotle's.

by mikebellman July 15, 2016

scatargraphy

the mapping of all the places where shit happens

Vehicle broke down. Adding another brown slpotch on my scatargraphy map.

by mikebellman March 28, 2014

Shat out

The act of using facebook, twitter, or social media seen by others on a mobile device while sitting on the toilet. Typically done in a public restroom.
Also called twitter piddle, foursquirt,

I'd like to give a shat out to my buddy Alex! - from stall #2, men's room, Columbia Mall.

by mikebellman March 22, 2011

Steven Gawking

The creepy mouth-breather guy at the mall who sits motionless & stares at young girls at the food court while drooling on himself.

OMG, Melissa. Pull up your shirt, Steven Gawking over there

by mikebellman May 31, 2011

Mehnopause

The life event in a man or woman's life when they realize their youth is completely behind them and therefore all enthusiasm has left their personality. MEH

While James looked as young as his mates, mehnopause kept this youthful gent only thinking about bills, work and knee pain.

Q: Wanna go out?
A: MEH

Q: How was work today?
A: MEH

Q: Bachelor Party!
A: MEH

by mikebellman November 18, 2012