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michael foolsley's definitions

MY DEAD DOG !

an expression of DOUBT! like saying: are you shitting me ?

there WAS a period where i had to stop saying this because several people i know just had a dog die!
APOLOGIES! to those finding THEMSELVES currently THERE!

it IS an "arty" slogan, and if you don't feel SOMETHING (good OR BAD !) it ISN'T ART !! still, a possibility of inappropriateness DOES exist !
trump: green is PURPLE ! -crazy uncle bwob: MY DEAD DOG !

let's have sixteen more beers!! college 'boy': MY DEAD DOG !

i lorraine "ground the poison out of me" last night! guy: MY DEAD DOG !
by michael foolsley March 30, 2022
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workin' and jerkin'

taking an 'active' role in life ! , by simply doing a 'job' oneself, when unable to find 'help' !!

in a HUGELY overpopulated world, there STILL remains quite a large number of males unable to get help moving spermatozoa !!
unable to be scared by an 'orthodox' christian, as regards to "going to hell" , all these males usually find themselves
ALREADY THERE !! 'flames' leapin' and licking all around them, as DNA 'ramps' up the heat!

a universal response to the question: what have YOU been up to lately ??
hey john! , what've YOU been up to lately ?? john: "workin' and jerkin' " !!
by michael foolsley April 1, 2022
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Jesus straps

"hook and loop" straps (note: the originals are known as "velcro")

these straps contain and manage cords, cables, ropes...e.t.c. , keeping them from catching on anything and everything,
or transforming themselves into a tangled mass! (or wrapping themselves around "the baby's" NECK !!)

the natural law is: when carrying ANYTHING (like a tv) the dangling cord will catch itself solidly on something, where one has to 'break stride' to get it free. this would NEVER happen in 5,000 tries at throwing the cord at the offending catch point! it ONLY catches when carrying something unsecured!
be right with you! , godda find a way to contain this cord! (response:) try this Jesus strap !

when setting up the PA, the previously attached Jesus straps saved my black ass !

what kind of idiot doesn't secure a cord ?? -Jesus straps your savior, infant!
by michael foolsley April 14, 2022
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pretty damn grim

something to mutter to oneself while looking out a window and seeing a rainy, gray, cold day!
'champagne charlie' looking out window at rainy, overcast weather: pretty damn grim

i don't even want to go out today! , pretty damn grim
by michael foolsley April 18, 2022
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skin pastry bag

"crude" def. = "DICK and BALLS !!"

skin pastry bag ANOTHER phrase useful in the most, prudish, "stiff" circles for: SUCK MY COCK !!
people CONSTANTLY trying to "sell" me something (U.S.) it's MY turn ! , i have a NICE, skin pastry bag to sell THEM !

buy a NEW CAR ? ("car dealer tv") I have something for sale ! , a NICE, skin pastry bag !!

have a go at my skin pastry bag !!
by michael foolsley April 18, 2022
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blooey

something catastrophically (or NOT!) FAILING! probably sourced from the ancient (1960's and earlier) CARTOONS !!

a person, place or thing going BAD !!

i love the sound of blooey ! another word that sounds like what it means, and also; DELIGHTFULLY

CRETINESQUE !!
seen john lately ? nope! , i heard he and lauren went blooey !!

i went to the cremators to 'bake' my dead dad after his heart went blooey!

sam bought a new ??? to replace the one he had that went blooey !
by michael foolsley November 8, 2021
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move shot

the terribly frustrating eternal burden of the male !! TRYING valiantly to get spermatozoa from point 'a' to point 'b' !
you up for seeing the michael foolsley band jim ? (pre covid) why not? , isle just be trying to move shot

lots of the fellows BURN IN HELL trying to move shot !!
by michael foolsley November 15, 2021
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