kofi's definitions

cumbath

luxurious indulgence, usually by a female, in a plentiful supply of semen. Her body is usually naked - as "bath" would suggest - both for practical and sensual reasons. For reasons of the standard male performance (5-12 cc of fresh ejaculate), more than one man is likely to be called on to turn on the supply for her. The alternative - pre-packaged sperm from one or more sources - is rather too gruesome to contemplate. And a girl can get mighty cold and bored waiting around in her birthday suit for a fully satisfactory coverage of her bathing needs by any one man's repeated creative outputs.

Cumbaths are by nature often more easily come by in porno - with the help of fluid supplements and substitutes, and a few sleights of hand - than in the hard light of workable reality.

by kofi May 19, 2003

Rag Week

(Everything Umbongo says is 80% true and 100% funny, but he could have added:) RAG WEEK is traditionally a part of the British university calendar. It is a fund-raising week for the poor and disadvantaged (not themselves), where students try to palm off funny writings, and (say) push toilets along the main street of town, swallow ugly-looking fluids, or try to set up new Guinness records for bedhopping, for fun and public cash. Errrr, but apart from that usual stuff, they give some of the resulting money to local or larger charitable organisations, such as the SLC (Student Loans Company).

A: So what are you doing for Rag Week?
B: I think I'll just stay in bed.
A: Have you got sponsorship for that?
B: No, but I have got a whoppin hangover.

by kofi May 15, 2003

Essex girl

a "common" (or very common) girl, not very bright, both overdressed (in cheap jewellery and tacky fashion) and underdressed (displaying her assets), always materialistic (loves shopping), likes drinking heavily (alcopops will do), and fucks indiscriminately and like a bunny, preferably with guys with a bit of money and claahhhss, but after a few drinks ... well, has to ask her best mate "Who WAS that guy I was with last night, 'Chelle?"

Fred: I heard you scored last night.
Rob: Yeah, just an Essex girl though. What about you?
Fred: Just went home.
Rob: Oh yeah, I forgot Trish is an Essex girl too!

by kofi May 12, 2003

Docs

Not to be confused with "Dockers", but following the same pseudo-tough image!
see DMs

Alice: That gal Traicy's not fit ta kiss mah Docs!
Sarah: Look, Alice, they're ENGLISH, right? Just like you. And stop slagging Tracy off. Girl can't help the way she is!
Alice: She gunna feel the steel toecap o mah noo Docs up ho' slutty ayuss, if she don't keep ho' paws offa mah Aidan!
Sarah: (d'Ohhhhhhh ....)

by kofi May 15, 2003

makossa

form of dance music originating in Afrika (Cameroun, to be precise). Noted for its repeated bright-toned picked-guitar figures, chanting-style vocals (often in Douala) and sometimes brass accompaniment, makossa is very upbeat. Sam Fan Thomas is perhaps its biggest name internationally. For better or worse, makossa has become a staple ingredient of "world music".

Have you heard "Samba Makossa" by Chico Science? A new blend of hip Afrikan and cool Brazilian grooves!

by kofi May 16, 2003

dickhead

1. man who "thinks with his dick". Someone so obsessed with (getting) sex that he is a gullible idiot, or:
2. man who seems to have a stubborn, blunt and essentially mindless organ where a brain should be: an insensitive asshole, or a clumsy Frankenstein.

Any good time girl loves a dickhead for a fling. GTG (to DH): "Oh, you needn't buy that for ME!!! Thanks."

by kofi April 20, 2006

lambada

Thankfully short-lived joke form of samba, a commercial bastardisation aimed at satisfying overweight, sweaty businessmen who could do no more than limply shuffle their feet about in pursuit of fame, fitness, fashion and pussy.

Lambada was a Brazilian answer to karaoke.

by kofi May 18, 2003