jellypuddinginmyanus42069's definitions
Marissa: Hey Josh, heard this crazy story about this voluptuous peter eskeeter named Seewagen - she chopped off her husbands dick, threw it in the woods, he sewed it back on, and then she chopped it off again. Feminism, huh?
by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 December 28, 2019
Get the peter eskeeter mug.noun • As per the name, a exuberantly ripe and spritely suck bestowed upon he most deserving of immediate sympathy, unable to be sufficiently provided otherwise. Such a rite is usually provided by the nearest willing female, who performs any sex act you may desire out of compassion for your sorry state.
Ben: hey sexy wanna smash?
Maggie: nah, fuck off creep
Ben: But I have stage 4 testicular cancer and don’t have long.
Maggie: In that case, come get your sympathy suck and I’ll make whatever time you have left worthwhile ;).
Ben: Ahahaha ueh
Maggie: (acckk uehhhh *#!& it’s so big and cancerous ueh)
Maggie: nah, fuck off creep
Ben: But I have stage 4 testicular cancer and don’t have long.
Maggie: In that case, come get your sympathy suck and I’ll make whatever time you have left worthwhile ;).
Ben: Ahahaha ueh
Maggie: (acckk uehhhh *#!& it’s so big and cancerous ueh)
by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 December 28, 2019
Get the sympathy suck mug.noun • a manner of reference to a characteristically vitriolic bitch who is either possessive of the predisposition to, or who has previously undertaken the action of removing the male phallic organ, usually subsequent to becoming enraged and overcome by her own flippant and ungainly emotions, to the point of performing such a heinous and vengeful act. Furthermore, such dismemberment is usually accomplished via the utilization of a sharp object, or potentially one that is comparatively duller if the perpetrator desires for a more lengthy and torturous removal and later thrown into adjacent vegetation and/or woods in order to secure difficulty in locating the separated life-giving essence of the human race.
Also see peter eskeeter
Also see peter eskeeter
Anthony: Awww shucks, that lumber liquidator Maggie done got me, looks like imma be stuck without my ween. Guess I’ll get back to sitting on my ass. Ueh ueh ueh
by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 January 11, 2020
Get the lumber liquidator mug.This is a variant of munging in which the corpse to be munged is a victim of the coronavirus, who is acquired via a local nursing home. To ensure proper social distancing, the participating individual who loses the coin toss, rock-paper-scissors, or other contest of choice, pops an experimental dick-enlarging pill which extends the participant’s penile length to 6 feet, in addition to donning a face mask with a slit cut out in the middle in order to allow the expelled mung and corona juice mixture (hence “COVID-mung”) to enter the perpetrator’s orifice(s) in an internationally acceptable manner.
Zack: Hey Cody, you wanna head over to the old folk’s home?
Cody: Yea sure... Why? You volunteering or something?
Zack: No, I just have a real strong hankering to perform a COVID-Munging on one of the former residents. Since I haven’t been able to get any quarantine pussy, I figured this’d be the next best thing to give my dick a nice kickstart.
Cody: You’re sick. What the fuck is wrong with you?
(Cody leaves the room only to quickly return, walking past Zack with the car keys)
Cody: C’mon you sick bastard, let’s go. Some old woman named Ethyl that I used to help just died and the way she put her muffins in the oven always made me sweat a bit.
Cody: Yea sure... Why? You volunteering or something?
Zack: No, I just have a real strong hankering to perform a COVID-Munging on one of the former residents. Since I haven’t been able to get any quarantine pussy, I figured this’d be the next best thing to give my dick a nice kickstart.
Cody: You’re sick. What the fuck is wrong with you?
(Cody leaves the room only to quickly return, walking past Zack with the car keys)
Cody: C’mon you sick bastard, let’s go. Some old woman named Ethyl that I used to help just died and the way she put her muffins in the oven always made me sweat a bit.
by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 July 6, 2020
Get the COVID-Munging mug.noun • a term used by white suburban housewives to refer to an African-American man of immense stature, and penile length, often consulted during periods of duress in pursuit of psychological, and usually sexual, satisfaction
(speaking to Zack, her daughter’s boyfriend)
Julianne: My daughter is in tears and you are NO PRINCE!!! We have been consulting the lord throughout this entire process, and he says you must surrender control, just like I surrendered control to the lord and his massive black cock. I felt his touch within me, and he filled me up to the brim with the enlightenment that I needed to deal with you, Zack. Now I will expel you from my daughter’s presence, unlike the lord’s child growing within me, so that I am always full of him.
Julianne: My daughter is in tears and you are NO PRINCE!!! We have been consulting the lord throughout this entire process, and he says you must surrender control, just like I surrendered control to the lord and his massive black cock. I felt his touch within me, and he filled me up to the brim with the enlightenment that I needed to deal with you, Zack. Now I will expel you from my daughter’s presence, unlike the lord’s child growing within me, so that I am always full of him.
by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 December 4, 2020
Get the the lord mug.Tim: Oh hey, Rob, don’t go in our room yet. I’ve got a Betty Whiter in there and I’m trying to milk her for her inheritance.
by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 December 4, 2020
Get the Betty Whiter mug.Tim: Oh hey, Rob, don’t go in our room just yet. I’ve got a Betty Whiter in there and I’m trying to milk her for her inheritance.
by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 December 4, 2020
Get the Betty Whiter mug.