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hodags1966's definitions

Feather

A father who truly enjoys playing with his very young children for extended periods of time, especially while sober.
Russ: Chris said he had a great time at the Great Wolf Lodge this weekend playing in the pool with his 4-year-old twins.

Ted: And he said he didn't even drink! What a fuckin' feather!

Russ: Yep, sober. He said tossing the beach ball was second most fun next to making waves with his arms.
by hodags1966 November 10, 2020
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Schwingularity

The exact moment your chubber crosses over to become a full-fledged hard-on
“Dammit! My hot teacher called me to the blackboard seconds after I crossed the schwingularity. I was so effing embarrassed. But hope my teacher was impressed.”
by hodags1966 November 10, 2020
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Put down the Sharpie

A request to someone to admit they are wrong.

In reference to Donald Trump's infamous Sharpie mark-up of an outdated hurricane forecast map. Rather than apologize, Trump continued to lie about the hurricane risk to Alabama for days.
"Dude, just put down the Sharpie. You don't always have to be right. I'm sick of arguing about this."
by hodags1966 September 6, 2019
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Empty Ballsack Syndrome (EBS)

A medical condition that prevents someone from speaking truth to power or making tough decisions, even at the expense of others and their own reputation and legacy. This illness swept through the GOP during the Trump years. EBS is caused by a lack of testicular fortitude.
“His unwillingness to disagree with Trump’s most recent wild-ass conspiracy is pathognomonic of Empty Ballsack Syndrome (EBS).”
by hodags1966 June 11, 2020
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NRA

What you say when someone asks you why the US flag is being flown at half-staff.
"Why is the flag half-staff?"
"NRA."
"Evil bastards. Which mass shooting was this? Hey, is it still 'too soon' to discuss gun control?
by hodags1966 November 10, 2018
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poor man's lettuce

"I always put poor man's lettuce on my sandwiches because potato chips stay crisp a helluva lot longer than stupid lettuce."

"Yeah, exactly. Why buy lettuce that lasts only like 3 days when chips will last weeks?"
by hodags1966 October 19, 2017
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anti-math

The logical next target for the anti-science climate-change deniers and the anti-Vaxxers.
"Oh, so, Chris, you don't believe in climate change? You're anti-science, huh?"
"Global warming is a hoax."
"Well, when that doesn't work out for you, maybe you can become anti-math."
by hodags1966 June 23, 2019
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