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daltonjfk's definitions

George W. F. H. Bush

Commando-in-sheets. President of working from home in nothing but a shirt. Gets dressed by invading the Dryrack. Went to Yale but pretends to be from Texas to gain acceptance from his O&G colleagues. Bedroom also known as the Broval Office.
Colleagues on Teams call: "I think you're on mute - we can't hear you."
George W. F. H. Bush: "But I can hear YOU!"
by daltonjfk September 24, 2021
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Ghettaway

A sad vacation to a sad location. The Ghettaway is the family getaway to Fort Lauderdale, the weddings in Palm Springs, the company retreats to Myrtle Beach, the honeymoon at the Hilton Honolulu. While most often accessed by car or RV, Ghettaway hotspots can also be reached via Spirit Airlines or Greyhound bus.

Common Ghettaway activities include threatening a divorce, sleeping with unattractive coworkers, wearing Oakley sunglasses, and yelling inappropriately at one's children in the line for cracked waterslides. Returning home with gift-shop T-shirts is typically considered a must.
The whole block knew it was time for the Bransons' annual Ghettaway to Virginia Beach when they could be seen packing their motor home with enough Mountain Dew for the two weeks of Spring Break.
by daltonjfk October 18, 2019
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Kim Jong Tune

A song so lit the masses submit to it unconditionally. Individuals of all music tastes have no choice but to adore its fat, wobbling rhythms. To criticise a Kim Jong Tune is a serious cultural heresy.

That fire drops like a nuclear bomb.
Back in the summer of 2015 I told people I didn’t like “Lean On”. The ensuing social ostracism I endured helped me understand that the song was in fact a Kim Jong Tune.
by daltonjfk September 23, 2019
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Like laundering

Liking one’s own instagram post from a secondary account. Dupes unsuspecting followers into believing the poster is one like more popular than they actually are.
“The main reason I started a meme page was to get into like laundering my own posts.”
by daltonjfk September 8, 2019
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Hostile sleepover

The decision by numerous drunk and high party guests to sleep over at the hosts’ house without proper permission.

As in a hostile takeover, these party-shareholders acquire the target’s assets, such as sofa cushions and armchairs, and force the hosts to accept the merging of their bedrooms into communal cesspools.

The aftermath of a hostile sleepover may see animosity between the hosts and the guests, as well as the gutting of hosts’ refrigerators and towels as guests seek to serve short-term hunger and hygiene needs.
Mitchell and Andrew had a Halloween party, everyone brought a plus one, and by 2AM with six people passed out on the couch and on the floor, it was clear a hostile sleepover was about to take place.
by daltonjfk October 30, 2019
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Mr. Clean's Dirty Secret

He has a foreigner cleaning his house.
His smug smile and white eyebrows give it all away - Mr. Clean's dirty secret arrives every Tuesday and Saturday and cleans his house with Shamwow.
by daltonjfk December 17, 2019
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Tinder Advent Calendar

Swiping psychotically through Tinder after dinner each night of the holidays to kill time and ensure matches.

Alone in quarantine or bored stiff on their parents' couch, young singles everywhere swipe to the end of their daily allowance, reaping a heinous daily match with a past-prime hometown hottie, or the waiter from the cafe downstairs you've never seen with his mask off. Tinder Advent Calendar matches offer all the short-lived indulgence of the advent chocolates of childhood, but with the added risk of a dick pic.
Harriet's Tinder Advent Calendar currently features Abs Joe from Chem, now a year-round receptionist, and Cute Window Guy who makes ugly infographics on his Instagram.
by daltonjfk December 17, 2020
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