crudmonkey's definitions
traffic that is so slow and horrendous that you can literally look out the window and count the stones embedded in the freeway pavement.
There was a pavement stone counter on Interstate 80 today because some illegals caused a car accident that flipped a semitruck over and caused 5 other cars to crash.
by crudmonkey May 16, 2022
Get the pavement stone countermug. A game played by a couple where the chick doesn't shave downstairs, and the object of the game is to tackle her, restrain her, and forcefully shave her nether regions with an electric razor. Both parties are naked while playing this game, and the chick runs around the room trying to avoid the "shepherd."
Mindy is mad at her boyfriend because he played "shear the sheep" with her last night and she lost. Now she's part of the metoo movement.
by crudmonkey June 17, 2018
Get the shear the sheepmug. Joe Biden said that he plans to save people 2400 dollars a year on their health prubremiums
(Source: State of the Union address 2022)
(Source: State of the Union address 2022)
by crudmonkey March 1, 2022
Get the health prubremiumsmug. Messing around, especially when it comes to a job or important activity. Could also be a reference to beating a dead horse when it comes to getting a machine or important piece of equipment to work.
Steve said that Dave was jimmy jacking around so he got yelled at. Because Dave's a lazy fat nerd and nobody likes him.
Look I'm not going to jimmy jack around with that head gasket, just get an expensive mechanic to do it!
Look I'm not going to jimmy jack around with that head gasket, just get an expensive mechanic to do it!
by crudmonkey December 3, 2020
Get the jimmy jacking aroundmug. Software that comes from China. Often cheap, full of scammy bugs, subscriptions that are stored on servers in the ghettos of nearby countries, and in some cases, spyware.
TikTok is Chinaware
by crudmonkey December 27, 2024
Get the Chinawaremug. a poor excuse by pink collar workers who are helping their female friend be lazy and avoid answering phone calls of high importance at corporate/bureaucratic/government agencies. 9 times out of 10 its so they can fuck their boyfriend in the bathroom while on the clock.
*phone rings*
-Goldberg Financial, Patti speaking
-Hi, I never received my paycheck and I need to talk to Melissa, who is in charge of my account
-Oh She's at lunch, can I take a message?
-NO! WTF?!!! MY FAMILY IS STARVING, THE RENT IS DUE, AND I ONLY HAVE THIS ONE HALF HOUR BREAK IN A 12 HOUR SHIFT TO GET THIS HANDLED WTF?!!
-Goldberg Financial, Patti speaking
-Hi, I never received my paycheck and I need to talk to Melissa, who is in charge of my account
-Oh She's at lunch, can I take a message?
-NO! WTF?!!! MY FAMILY IS STARVING, THE RENT IS DUE, AND I ONLY HAVE THIS ONE HALF HOUR BREAK IN A 12 HOUR SHIFT TO GET THIS HANDLED WTF?!!
by crudmonkey October 9, 2020
Get the she's at lunchmug. Bob to John: Oh look, John has his pokeyman cards hhahahhahahahahahhaha!
*John socks Bob in the jaw, knocking him over*
Bob: MOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!
*John socks Bob in the jaw, knocking him over*
Bob: MOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!
by crudmonkey February 23, 2021
Get the pokeymanmug.