1 definition by boarder-dude
The Zone is an ethereal state of mind that propels you from mortal man to super human, to godlike status. Performance, whether physical or technically challenging, is elevated effortlessly beyond your normal level. You feel no pain within your body and your reactions and balance become unhumanly fast. Things that were difficult previously become effortlessly easy. Failure does not even enter your mind and does not even seem possible. You soar with the angels and ride, tall and proud beside the god Helios, upon a golden winged chariot. You have become a god among mortal men.
Unfortunately the Zone is an ephemeral place and in the way that you unknowingly entered the Zone (you just arrive, you don’t know quite how), you are unceremoniously booted out of it. This usually involves collecting all the pain that you missed out on when in the Zone and dishing it out in one big serving. Once you have left the Zone it is commonplace to try and fight your back into it, but this never works and, in fact, generally speaking the zone gets further away the harder you try to get to it.
Unfortunately the Zone is an ephemeral place and in the way that you unknowingly entered the Zone (you just arrive, you don’t know quite how), you are unceremoniously booted out of it. This usually involves collecting all the pain that you missed out on when in the Zone and dishing it out in one big serving. Once you have left the Zone it is commonplace to try and fight your back into it, but this never works and, in fact, generally speaking the zone gets further away the harder you try to get to it.
Act 1: “In the Zone”
Dude 1: Yo dude, you were totally fucking sick out there. You are in the fucking zone, man. Give me some skin.
{Translation: Greetings, good fellow. Your yonder performance was thoroughly splendid. You are indeed performing better than the norm. Let me congratulate you by shaking your hand}
Dude 2: Good man, I soar with the angels and ride, tall and proud beside the god Helios, upon a golden winged chariot. I speak not to mortal man.
{Translation: Fuck off, loser}
Dude 1: You are such a fucking dick, fuck off
{Translation: You are such a fucking dick, fuck off}
Act 2: “Exit form Zone”
Dude 2: Fuck man, I think I have bust my back, I can’t move my fucking legs. Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Dude 1: Fuck you, asshole, where’s your fucking mate Helios now? Ha ha ha.
Dude 2: Get me a fucking medic, man!
Medic: Son, an air ambulance is on its way. I’m just going to give you some oxygen and a shot of morphine. Hang in there, son…
Dude 1: Yo dude, you were totally fucking sick out there. You are in the fucking zone, man. Give me some skin.
{Translation: Greetings, good fellow. Your yonder performance was thoroughly splendid. You are indeed performing better than the norm. Let me congratulate you by shaking your hand}
Dude 2: Good man, I soar with the angels and ride, tall and proud beside the god Helios, upon a golden winged chariot. I speak not to mortal man.
{Translation: Fuck off, loser}
Dude 1: You are such a fucking dick, fuck off
{Translation: You are such a fucking dick, fuck off}
Act 2: “Exit form Zone”
Dude 2: Fuck man, I think I have bust my back, I can’t move my fucking legs. Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Dude 1: Fuck you, asshole, where’s your fucking mate Helios now? Ha ha ha.
Dude 2: Get me a fucking medic, man!
Medic: Son, an air ambulance is on its way. I’m just going to give you some oxygen and a shot of morphine. Hang in there, son…
by boarder-dude August 12, 2014