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Zamboozee's definitions

Troubadour

A garlic-eating folk singer of ancient origins; as a group they generally being ones flourishing principally in the Middle Ages in the South of France writing catchy tunes and jingles in a complex metric form for court musicians.
I am not a not a man with a pointy stick wanting to poke unwilling participants in the gladiatorial games with it (and thus who do not like it up them), I am a troubadour, that is, one whom sings soppy love songs to courtly people with nothing much better to do than to listen to those who sing sad songs about unrequited love in drafty old castles by the sea.
by Zamboozee April 24, 2011
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Furball

A tightly packed mass of hair regurgitated by a cat or other feline, or a dog, or an other hairy mammal, that comes from it licking itself all day long because it likes to do it, preferably while people are watching. In humans this behaviour has a scientific name, but it still does not make it any less disgusting.
A middle aged balding man with astigmatism and a sinister squint walks into a doctor’s surgery one day and says to the receptionist, “Well Doc. I puked up this massive hairball from my stomach this morning, straight after breakfast, I guess that this means you think I should stop eating my hair them?” Needless to say the receptionist was none too pleased at hearing this news about a man producing a furball for breakfast, not least because she had just came back from lunch.
by Zamboozee April 13, 2011
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Sexual partner

That man or woman or person who shares all your most intimate sexual moments with you on a daily or long-term basis, he or she being of either sex, or, occasionally the same sex, or, sometimes, being a mix of sexes, or occasionally someone of no sex at all (but that does not often happen). In normal sexual relationships, mostly being someone of either one sex or another who, with his or her partner of choice, enjoy carnal knowledge of each other on a long-term basis, as according to the sexual preference of either partner.
Come, my dear, be my sexual partner, either for a day or two or maybe even the rest of our lives, or maybe even come skipping up the aisle with me and, with a bit of luck, and in the meantime, we’ll also have some fun between the sheets whenever we want to, weather permitting.
by Zamboozee May 4, 2011
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double-dumbass

A handy phrase meaning that the insult of being called a stupid arsehole, or (an alternative interpretation) an asinine fool, can be doubled and can be reflected back to whence it came in a way that turns a totally uncalled for insult flung at its intended target back upon its perpetrator, possibly also in a way not fully understood by its vulgarian receiver, he not being up on such things as witty retorts, or such logical insinuations as this phrase supposedly represents. However, if no other rebuffs spring to mind, in a pinch it does the job nicely.
Watch what you say to me, you double-dumbass, as I wasn’t even talking to you, I was talking to myself!
by Zamboozee May 17, 2011
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double mind Jedi

Disrupting or attacking the opposition from within by secretly infiltrating its organization or territory through stealth, and then using its own weapons against it.
To eradicate all those who collaborate with an enemy by assassinating anybody who collaborated with the enemy is a double mind Jedi. As it is commonly known.
by Zamboozee May 28, 2011
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Frond

A decorative border of fig leaves; a leaf shaped somewhat like a narrow phallus, as of a seaweed or lichen; personal regalia often used as camouflage by US Marines in hot climates in World War II, but not presently being recommended in the US Armed Services for wear as camouflage or other bodily ornament, for those unfortunates currently serving in an urban jungle of forgotten dreams, or other built up areas or ethnic urban ghettos, either in the States or elsewhere.
The Marine said, “My frond is slipping,” having little or no dress sense while in his current deployment in the field, as he should have just been wearing the right makeup or other appropriate camouflage for the job in the desert of forgotten dreams.
by Zamboozee April 13, 2011
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Man-Bag

A man who has let himself be used by another man as a carry-all on the street for narcotics such as crack cocaine or heroine, the drugs in question being rolled up in condoms and then hidden up his bottom and transported to their destination in that way, either by walking, car, motorbike, push-bike, bus, train, ferry, or helicopter, either locally or long distance, but not internationally.
My dear chap, all I want you to do this morning is to transport these rolled up condoms full of cocaine through the streets up your bottom. There is no question of you being a Man-Bag for me, as I will not even be on the street with you, as this is something you are doing for your own profit and entirely of your own volition.
by Zamboozee May 11, 2011
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