YAWA's definitions

Priority Fail

Any point in time when a spouse, child, family member or ANYONE ELSE in your physical perimeter becomes subordinate to text, email, tweet or any other virtual bullshit method of communication.

Hey mom, did you hear about the kid that turned COVID positive at school today?
***continues texting***
Yeah, so it turns out that he was at the graduation party last week.
***continues texting***
And so I got tested for the virus.
***continues texting***
I'm positive for COVID-19

WHAT!!!! WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SOMETHING!? YOU COULD INFECT ALL OF US!!

(Priority Fail)

by YAWA July 14, 2020

Masking Ticket

The penalty for anyone that somehow feels that wearing an appropriate face covering during the COVID pandemic is more an infringement on individual freedom of CHOICE, than a DUTY of public responsibility.

Hey, what's the speed limit?
Well, on the interstate, it's 70 miles per hour.
Ok, what side of the road do we drive on in the US?
On the right side, of course.
Why do we wear masks to protect others from acquiring COVID 19?
We don't! That's a violation of individual freedom of expression!
WRONG! You and your dumb ass, COVID positive president have just EARNED a Masking Ticket for genuine STUPIDITY, insensitivity and demonstrating a flagrant disregard for humanity.

by YAWA October 4, 2020

pooch screwer

The one that does it: Screws the pooch.

Oh, for fuck sake!! A 4th down fumble on the 2nd yard line?! Really!? The QB's a goddam pooch screwer!!

by YAWA February 12, 2023

Old Lives Matter

In a world where economic preservation is value-compared over safeguarding life, some leaders have proposed a 'business as usual' plan that accepts significant mortality in deference to maintaining a healthy economy. Must we sacrifice the pillars of our society to COVID-19?

Who really gives a shit if a bunch of old fucks bit it? Weren't they gonna die soon anyway? And, they fucked up the climate...
Maybe, but aren't they also the ones that actually created a world that's safe for you to actually say that?

Old Lives Matter...

by YAWA April 26, 2020

Anyone BUT Trump

The global sigh of relief generated in the comforting realization that the criminal-in-chief has been denied a second term.

The world just realized that it's not just that Biden was elected President that feels so good; it's that the highest office in the land will be occupied by Anyone BUT Trump, the worst fucking President in recorded history.

by YAWA November 8, 2020

Tribute Tan

A MAGA crowd identifier (similar to ‘post gunshot’ ear bandage) wherein participants self-apply facial bronzing agent in propitiation to their great leader.

Oh, don’t ya think that Katie’s got it goin’ on with the Tribute Tan!
Close, needs a bit more Pumpkin-Umber to truly be authentic.

by YAWA October 19, 2025

Zoom Warrior

As a direct consequence of the COVID pandemic, the iconic trade-show driven Road Warrior salesman has been transformed into a mere digital shadow of its former presence.

You goin' to the Consumer Electronics Show, HIMSS Conference or BrewEXPO this year?
Kinda. Everything is on-line, I guess this year I'm Zoom Warrior.

by YAWA September 5, 2020