(noun)-A conlang(a constructed language), usually made by an amateur conlanger who thinks that they can make their own language more interesting by cramming it with as many rare and weird features that they can possibly find so that their language becomes more 'cool', 'unique' and 'non-Englishy', but ends up being so overly complicated and hard to understand that it just results in an unholy mess
Anthony(new to conlanging): Hey Bob, I made my own language for a world building project I'm doing!
Bob(unknowing of what's about to come): Oh cool, can you show it to me?
Anthony: It's a polysynthetic split-ergative strongly head initial Navajo-Basque-Mongolian inspired language with polypersonal agreement, 6 numbers singular, dual, trial, paucal, collective and plural, 69 grammatical cases, 13 different types of evidentiality such as visual, auditory, olfactory, gustatory, tactile, reportative, hearsay, folktale, book-read, guessed, made-up, someone-told-me-but-I-don't-remember-who and known-lie, 19 different genders, 15 different tenses like present, just-before, an-hour-ago, earlier-today, yesterday, the-day-before-yesterday, a-week-ago, before that, a-moment-later, an-hour-later, later-today, tomorrow, the-day-after-tomorrow, a week later, after that, 12 different tones, a base-60 numeral system, OVS word order, 100 different clicks, a voiced linguolabial trill, only voiceless vowels, seven voiceless pharyngeal trills, a CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCVCCCCCCCCCCCCC syllable structure, noun incorporation, twenty degrees of politeness, an abugida-logo-abjad hybrid writing system, and a word for every single rgb colour value. I made it to imitate how real languages work so that my fictional race of dog-headed creatures with dragon wings in my novel trilogy feels more realistic and alive.
Bob: Bruh that is literally the worst kitchen sink conlang I have ever seen
Bob(unknowing of what's about to come): Oh cool, can you show it to me?
Anthony: It's a polysynthetic split-ergative strongly head initial Navajo-Basque-Mongolian inspired language with polypersonal agreement, 6 numbers singular, dual, trial, paucal, collective and plural, 69 grammatical cases, 13 different types of evidentiality such as visual, auditory, olfactory, gustatory, tactile, reportative, hearsay, folktale, book-read, guessed, made-up, someone-told-me-but-I-don't-remember-who and known-lie, 19 different genders, 15 different tenses like present, just-before, an-hour-ago, earlier-today, yesterday, the-day-before-yesterday, a-week-ago, before that, a-moment-later, an-hour-later, later-today, tomorrow, the-day-after-tomorrow, a week later, after that, 12 different tones, a base-60 numeral system, OVS word order, 100 different clicks, a voiced linguolabial trill, only voiceless vowels, seven voiceless pharyngeal trills, a CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCVCCCCCCCCCCCCC syllable structure, noun incorporation, twenty degrees of politeness, an abugida-logo-abjad hybrid writing system, and a word for every single rgb colour value. I made it to imitate how real languages work so that my fictional race of dog-headed creatures with dragon wings in my novel trilogy feels more realistic and alive.
Bob: Bruh that is literally the worst kitchen sink conlang I have ever seen
by Wormhole512729 March 17, 2023
FOELs (pronounced fool) are Failures Of Existence/Living.
They are individuals who due to no circumstances under their control, are simply born into situations that render them unable to live life to any of the same potential of happiness, success or positive experience as the regular average person. These people have situations entirely unfixable leaving them in states of constant mental, physical and social pain. It is important that they are aware of this inability themselves.They generally either commit suicide or give up on ever trying to fit into standard society, generally leading to virulent escapism.
These often include:
-People with mental illnesses such as BPD, Chronic Depression, OCD, Anxiety
-People with broken and abusive families that cause lifelong emotional trauma (PTSD)
-People with bodies that work against them such as transgender people, disabled people
-People trapped in highly toxic and dehumanising education/employment/social groups
They are individuals who due to no circumstances under their control, are simply born into situations that render them unable to live life to any of the same potential of happiness, success or positive experience as the regular average person. These people have situations entirely unfixable leaving them in states of constant mental, physical and social pain. It is important that they are aware of this inability themselves.They generally either commit suicide or give up on ever trying to fit into standard society, generally leading to virulent escapism.
These often include:
-People with mental illnesses such as BPD, Chronic Depression, OCD, Anxiety
-People with broken and abusive families that cause lifelong emotional trauma (PTSD)
-People with bodies that work against them such as transgender people, disabled people
-People trapped in highly toxic and dehumanising education/employment/social groups
-Ron: My mind can't feel anything. I have never had a single meaningful relationship with another human being. I was born this way. My brain can't function normally and I am an outcast from society. I can't hold a job, talk to people or enjoy shit. All I feel is emptiness and frustration. Nobody likes me, and nobody ever will. I have hurt other people without feeling sorry for it and I am despised by my own family. All I am is a foel.
by Wormhole512729 March 23, 2025