school

Going to school against your will has the equivalent life-shortening effect of smoking 94,254 cigarettes. 8 hours a day times 180 days a year times 60 minutes divided by 11 minutes lost per cigarette. This calculation doesn't take into account homework, so the number of cigarettes would be even higher.
One valuable thing I learned from school is to never have children so they won't have to go through what I did.
by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter September 11, 2007
Get the school mug.

twentieth century bathroom

A public restroom missing so much as ONE of these 21st century features:
1. Infrared automatic faucets that stay on as long as you are moving your hands
2. Automatic hand dryer and/or automatic paper towels
3. Self flushing toilet/urinal
4. Automatic soap
Don't go in that McDonalds down the street if you have 7 year diarrhea, they only have a twentieth century bathroom.
Get the twentieth century bathroom mug.

I'm slitting my stomach

Harakiri, seppuku, belly cutting. It's when you take a samurai sword and carve into the skin and fat of your abdomen and as you feel the pain, reach into the bloody mess and pull out your guts. Most likely you die from a lack of blood. Some more cowardly samurai would get their friend to chop off their head to ease the pain.
My geisha left me, my trainer got shot with arrows, and my bird ran away...I'm slitting my stomach.

I'm a manly samurai--I'm slitting my stomach, and I don't want any assistance as I go on my instant trip to an eternal vacation.
by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter November 23, 2007
Get the I'm slitting my stomach mug.

polish the pope

Male masturbation. So called because the previous Pope was Polish, and the male organ looked like a Mitre and polishing it gives the user pleasure
More children would be happier if more priests would stay at home and polish the pope.
by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter November 19, 2007
Get the polish the pope mug.

milk money young

In a May-December relationship, a way to describe the younger partner, especially when the younger partner looks like it hasn't passed puberty yet. May be a warning that a statutory rape could happen.
52 year old Schizo Woman:I just got a boyfriend, he's kinda young.
Rosanne:How young? Is he milk money young?
52 year old Schizo Woman:He's 14.
Get the milk money young mug.

homebrew cartridge

A cartridge containing flash memory that enables unsigned code or ROMs to be run on a game console. Hard to find because the ESA thinks it encourages piracy.
When my GBA has a homebrew cartridge, it can play 90 minutes of stereo music per 32MB ROM, play 5 minutes of video in 16MB, and store 100 photos in 4MB, as well as play 8-bit NES games.
Get the homebrew cartridge mug.

knight in bloody armor

A medieval knight in polished shiny plate armor which is now splattered and dripping with the blood and bits of the guts of someone the knight has murdered.
Seeing one of these knights while in battle should instill fear as you might end up painting his armor.
King Arthur, the knight in bloody armor, stabbed his son with Excalibur and the blood came out Mordred's mouth.

That's when William Wallace, the knight in bloody armor, slit open the Queen's chest, revealing her insides. He then removed them, slathering himself in their resplendent glory.
by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter December 24, 2007
Get the knight in bloody armor mug.