Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter's definitions

dance naked in the forest

What cycle-accurate Pagans do. They take off their clothes and dance in the woods. Not necessarily a bad thing because some Pagans look quite nonsexually beautiful/handsome naked.

You can pray for me, and I'll dance naked in the forest for you.

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter November 15, 2007

school

Going to school against your will has the equivalent life-shortening effect of smoking 94,254 cigarettes. 8 hours a day times 180 days a year times 60 minutes divided by 11 minutes lost per cigarette. This calculation doesn't take into account homework, so the number of cigarettes would be even higher.

One valuable thing I learned from school is to never have children so they won't have to go through what I did.

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter September 22, 2007

Druidess

A female Druid. The original ones used to dance naked in the forest worshiping trees. Druids are a type of Pagan.

Also a type of character in the Faerytale Era.

That druidess with her long black hair is beautiful.
The druidess casted a spell to summon dragons.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter October 19, 2007

imminent global apocalypse

Used as a comparison to righteously downplay the purported wrongness of a non-criminal act when it's presented as criminal. It trivializes unnecessary hatred toward a deed.

What imminent global apocalypse will happen if I fart in public? If I had 300 million dollars I'd pay someone $20 everytime I caught them farting in public.

Is there an imminent global apocalypse that will occur if I stay up during the night while you sleep, provided that I am quiet?

No matter how hard Marx tried, he couldn't stop the imminent global apocalypse that happened when people smoked marijuana in the privacy of their own homes.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter March 4, 2008

I'm slitting my stomach

Harakiri, seppuku, belly cutting. It's when you take a samurai sword and carve into the skin and fat of your abdomen and as you feel the pain, reach into the bloody mess and pull out your guts. Most likely you die from a lack of blood. Some more cowardly samurai would get their friend to chop off their head to ease the pain.

My geisha left me, my trainer got shot with arrows, and my bird ran away...I'm slitting my stomach.

I'm a manly samurai--I'm slitting my stomach, and I don't want any assistance as I go on my instant trip to an eternal vacation.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter December 25, 2007

bred like a nymphomaniac rabbit on Viagra

What a human has done who thinks the only meaning of life is to make more life. Often has 6 or more children, wants to get free paychecks, has many spouses (consecutively or concurrently), wants time off from work, and doesn't believe in either condoms or abstinence.

Heather's grandmother bred like a nymphomaniac rabbit on Viagra. She had 17 children, each and every one a body mass index of 40.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter April 23, 2008

shake your silly snake

To masturbate, that is, stroke the genitals for sexual pleasure. Usually it refers to men as their penis is shaped like a snake, and a shaking action ensures orgasm.

LinktheChristian:I'm going to go home and clean my sword.
GanontheDevil:You're going to shake your silly snake!
ThaddeustheTolerant:Elves don't have a need to jerk something that small.

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter November 14, 2007