Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter's definitions

the age of well-behaving animals

The Christian afterlife, when lions can be petted by humans while sitting next to a lamb, without fear of getting mauled. Since humans are of the animal kingdom, they will behave good too.

In the age of well-behaving animals, no strain of bacteria would not make us sick, and elephants wouldn't trample children.

In the age of well-behaving animals, no one would bother going to war or steal from someone.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter January 12, 2008

I'm slitting my stomach

Harakiri, seppuku, belly cutting. It's when you take a samurai sword and carve into the skin and fat of your abdomen and as you feel the pain, reach into the bloody mess and pull out your guts. Most likely you die from a lack of blood. Some more cowardly samurai would get their friend to chop off their head to ease the pain.

My geisha left me, my trainer got shot with arrows, and my bird ran away...I'm slitting my stomach.

I'm a manly samurai--I'm slitting my stomach, and I don't want any assistance as I go on my instant trip to an eternal vacation.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter December 25, 2007

Thorodin

A cool made up male Viking name, it is Thor crossed with Odin. So if someone's a little higher than the pagan gods, they are Thorodin. Pronounced thore-uh-dinn.

Thorodin tore out the Crusader's jugular vein with his teeth like it was the tape out of a cassette.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter December 25, 2007

15-bit marriage

Denoting a state of being where you are freely allowed to have from 0 to 32,767 wives/husbands. Two to the 15th power is 32,768, and there is also the state of having no spouse, so the values are from zero to thirty-two thousand, seven hundred and sixty seven. So one could have either 32,767 wives or any combination of wives and husbands in one family adding up to 32,767. The original Mormons were engineered with a 15-bit marriage, the highest in post-100A.D. history.

The Mormons had the resplendent promise of giving the user a 15-bit marriage, but in 1890 they caved in to government pressure to be cycle-inaccurate and therefore have only one spouse.

When I die I hope I can have a 15-bit marriage in Heaven.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter January 9, 2008

cycle-accurate Mormon

One of the few Mormons who openly practices polygamy and doesn't do statutory rape and/or breed too much. The only Mormons to grow a set and stand up for what they believe in.

The cycle-accurate Mormon went to his home and hugged his 2 wives and his husband.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter December 25, 2007

drives to the mailbox

Describing of a person of unfathomably great laziness. Looks for every opportunity to get out of work. Even trivial chores are too much of a finger lift for them. So called because they will get into their car, turn the key, adjust the mirrors, put on their seatbelt, and drive to the mailbox that is at the end of their driveway.

My neighbor is so lazy he drives to the mailbox. It is .07 miles away.

by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighter January 9, 2008

Speared

A person who has been injured, slaughtered, or maimed by a long shafted weapon with a pointy blade at its tip is said to have been Speared.

Not only black people can be Speared, but white, yellow, and red people too.

Mel Gibson deliberately waited until the family reunion dinner to tell his story about how he Speared one of his acting buddies by accident in the gut and how chunky white puke came out from her punctured duodenum and out the gash in the abdomen. They had to call the ecnalubma.

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter November 15, 2007