Wisk's definitions

murray

The 13th tribe of Israel, named for the Patriarch Murray Liebowitz the Hat Blocker. Fled Palestine around 70 AD and fled to the Dingle Region of Ireland. Hoards of them poured out of the hill region and into the US, Australia, and Canada after the Potato Famine, or as it was dubbed at the time,"That afternoon we were a wee bit low on Chips." They are Ubiquitous today, being found in every profession, race, color, or creed, under the floor boards and even in the cupboards. Go have a look.

Terrence was cleaning out his tobacco tin, and out popped a Murray for the third time in a week.
"Sorry to shock you so, I was just livin' in your tobacoo tin. I'll go now, but be warned, I've 3 brothers in your dishwasher, and a few aunts and uncles in your pantry. They might not be so agreeable as I."
The Murray ran his finger along the inside of his collar and looked about the kitchen.
I've a bit of a thirst, do you mind if I borrow a jar of Ale from you before I'm on my way?"

by Wisk January 29, 2008

tin foil hat

The special properties of aluminum foil that shield the brain from being read by "liberal activist" scientists. Also works nicely as a rain hat that gives the "tin roof" effect.

Dick Cheney hated getting wet for it faded his outer humanoid membrane. He discovered the tin foil hat he wore from his "undisclosed location" kept him warm and toasty.

by Wisk January 30, 2008

Elliot Spitzer

1) The money shot of self-ruination.
2) A mixture of stroked Guvner's juice and chilled soda.

1) Jeffrey brought his coworker Ashley home during their lunch hour, but finished with an Elliot Spitzer and a nap. His wife Sally came home and gave him only enough time to grab his shaving kit and box of porn.

2) Seacrest tallied up the votes, and declared Elliot Spitzer delicious!

by wisk March 13, 2008

Limbaugher

Cheese produced from swabbing the folds in Rush Limbaugh's skin. Top Fortune 500 performer in last quarter.

We managed to get some vintage Limbaugher from a floor trader who had some connections. We talked about interest rates, capital gains, stock portfolios with a bottle of Cognac and this remarkable cheese. We wondered how they could produce such a gastronomical delight.

by Wisk February 5, 2008

personality vomit

To spew out every personal detail of your life to someone you've just met.

I thought we were just complaining about how long the line was at the Handy Pantry when the guy next to me covered me with personality vomit. Before I left, I knew about his divorce, his bankruptcy, and the infection he got popping a pimple on his ass.

by wisk April 24, 2008

heck of a job

How well one does at blowing high ranking Republican officials. Swallowing is a must. Usually results in an appointment as bureau chief of some federal agency. Must achieve this score at least twice to head become Attorney General.

Dubya rated Brownie's fantastic hummer on national television. "Heck of a job," Dubya proclaimed, and Brownie beamed like Thomas the Tank Engine. Normally this would mean CEO of some defense or drug company at the end of the administration, but unfortunately it was during the Katrina disaster. Brownie's chances for that were severely curtailed. Not that Brownie minded, but he would have to receive his perks through the back door.

by Wisk January 17, 2008

McCarthyism

To live according to the words of Prophet and Beatle Paul McCartney. Quickest way to get medicated. (other options, Ringoism, Lennonism)

Woke up, got out of bed. Dragged a comb across my head. Side by side on my Piano, Oh lord. You know you was a suffragete, Jet Boooooooooo....The movement I need is on my shoulder, Jude. Wearing the face that I keeps in a jar by the door, no of course it isn't my face. How would I do that? Live and let die!-Cohesive Word Salad of McCarthyism

by Wisk February 5, 2008