Wisk's definitions

heck of a job

How well one does at blowing high ranking Republican officials. Swallowing is a must. Usually results in an appointment as bureau chief of some federal agency. Must achieve this score at least twice to head become Attorney General.

Dubya rated Brownie's fantastic hummer on national television. "Heck of a job," Dubya proclaimed, and Brownie beamed like Thomas the Tank Engine. Normally this would mean CEO of some defense or drug company at the end of the administration, but unfortunately it was during the Katrina disaster. Brownie's chances for that were severely curtailed. Not that Brownie minded, but he would have to receive his perks through the back door.

by Wisk January 17, 2008

McCarthyism

To live according to the words of Prophet and Beatle Paul McCartney. Quickest way to get medicated. (other options, Ringoism, Lennonism)

Woke up, got out of bed. Dragged a comb across my head. Side by side on my Piano, Oh lord. You know you was a suffragete, Jet Boooooooooo....The movement I need is on my shoulder, Jude. Wearing the face that I keeps in a jar by the door, no of course it isn't my face. How would I do that? Live and let die!-Cohesive Word Salad of McCarthyism

by Wisk February 5, 2008

personality vomit

To spew out every personal detail of your life to someone you've just met.

I thought we were just complaining about how long the line was at the Handy Pantry when the guy next to me covered me with personality vomit. Before I left, I knew about his divorce, his bankruptcy, and the infection he got popping a pimple on his ass.

by wisk April 24, 2008

ringoism

To try to live by the example set by our lord savior Ringo Starr, or Richard Starkey as he is known to people from his hood.

We thought the cult of Ringoism would start off with a bang, but we really couldn't come up with much. The pot smoking got a little stale, and Jimmy was busted for trying to break into the "Thomas the Tank Engine" studio. We thought about banging Barbara Bach, but decided to wank off on some old playboys instead.

by Wisk February 5, 2008

fecal lucidity

The ability to concentrate that is regained upon moving one's bowels.

Jim got home from work to Cindy's litany of how badly the kids were behaving, but fortunately for them, they were in luck. Jim could not concentrate on a single word with the turtle head poking out. Once he was done dumping he achieved a level of unmatched fecal lucidity.
"So," sighed Jim deeply, walking out of the bathroom, "Anything interesting happen today?"

by Wisk January 31, 2008

tin foil hat

The special properties of aluminum foil that shield the brain from being read by "liberal activist" scientists. Also works nicely as a rain hat that gives the "tin roof" effect.

Dick Cheney hated getting wet for it faded his outer humanoid membrane. He discovered the tin foil hat he wore from his "undisclosed location" kept him warm and toasty.

by Wisk January 30, 2008

Elliot Spitzer

1) The money shot of self-ruination.
2) A mixture of stroked Guvner's juice and chilled soda.

1) Jeffrey brought his coworker Ashley home during their lunch hour, but finished with an Elliot Spitzer and a nap. His wife Sally came home and gave him only enough time to grab his shaving kit and box of porn.

2) Seacrest tallied up the votes, and declared Elliot Spitzer delicious!

by wisk March 13, 2008