Wisk's definitions

tin foil hat

The special properties of aluminum foil that shield the brain from being read by "liberal activist" scientists. Also works nicely as a rain hat that gives the "tin roof" effect.

Dick Cheney hated getting wet for it faded his outer humanoid membrane. He discovered the tin foil hat he wore from his "undisclosed location" kept him warm and toasty.

by Wisk January 30, 2008

Elliot Spitzer

1) The money shot of self-ruination.
2) A mixture of stroked Guvner's juice and chilled soda.

1) Jeffrey brought his coworker Ashley home during their lunch hour, but finished with an Elliot Spitzer and a nap. His wife Sally came home and gave him only enough time to grab his shaving kit and box of porn.

2) Seacrest tallied up the votes, and declared Elliot Spitzer delicious!

by wisk March 13, 2008

Lennonism

Based on the teachings of the former leader of the USSR who went on to found the Beatles with Senator Joe McCarthy. Involves purging and binging, and giving peace and five-year plans a chance. John Vladimir Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov Petrovich Juan Valdez Diego de Montoya Lennon (1870-1980)

Lennon pulled his country out of the first world war in order to give peace a chance. McCarthy finished up with communist witch hunts just in time to Join Lennon and Former President Harrison and Special Prosecutor Starr at the Hollywood bowl. The girls were wet and wild when they opened up with "Can't Buy me Love." Historians believe that Beatlemania was a natural extension of Lennonism, which in turn, was a product of the reformation and the Council of Trent.

by Wisk February 5, 2008

halle berry

1) Holistic supplement known to cause wild mood swings.
2) To release the breasts from their bindings in order to tan them.
3) Dingleberry specific to people named Halle. Unusually low in fiber. (see Halle's comet)
4) A corporation formerly run by Vice President and marksman Dick Cheney.

1) I don't know what came over me. I had some halleberry tea, and before I knew it, I was on a Steamer bound for Cleveland.
2) First lady Barbara Bush was fond of a daily halle berry in the rose garden. She claimed it did her a spell o' good.
3) Billy Bob wasn't one to complain, but he struggled with the Halle Berries mashed against his loins, due to their unusual consistency and aroma.
4) Halle Berry was awarded a no-bid contract, probably due to some relationship to the former first lady.

by wisk March 13, 2008

Stimulus Package

1) A delivery of Sexual Toys.

Nancy cancelled her plans for the evening, as she would be staying in tonight and watching CNN. Her latest stimulus package had arrived.

by Wisk February 16, 2009

McCarthyism

To live according to the words of Prophet and Beatle Paul McCartney. Quickest way to get medicated. (other options, Ringoism, Lennonism)

Woke up, got out of bed. Dragged a comb across my head. Side by side on my Piano, Oh lord. You know you was a suffragete, Jet Boooooooooo....The movement I need is on my shoulder, Jude. Wearing the face that I keeps in a jar by the door, no of course it isn't my face. How would I do that? Live and let die!-Cohesive Word Salad of McCarthyism

by Wisk February 5, 2008

heck of a job

How well one does at blowing high ranking Republican officials. Swallowing is a must. Usually results in an appointment as bureau chief of some federal agency. Must achieve this score at least twice to head become Attorney General.

Dubya rated Brownie's fantastic hummer on national television. "Heck of a job," Dubya proclaimed, and Brownie beamed like Thomas the Tank Engine. Normally this would mean CEO of some defense or drug company at the end of the administration, but unfortunately it was during the Katrina disaster. Brownie's chances for that were severely curtailed. Not that Brownie minded, but he would have to receive his perks through the back door.

by Wisk January 17, 2008