Wise Man's definitions

chinese essay

When you are extremely close to shitting your pants and the turd has already begun to sprout it can draw patterns in your pants when you walk. The resulting pattern can be likened to a chinese essay.

Neil: Look at Stu doing the john wayne walk to the bog.
Me: Yeah, he must be writing a chinese essay in there.

by Wise Man October 7, 2003

hatch a monster loaf

To deliver a large amount of excrement in one piece.

I was on the bog this morning and i hatched a monster loaf, i swear it was coming out sideways!!

by Wise Man July 11, 2003

Aromatic Abuse

A really bad fart, one that smells like actual real ripe poo, you could be forgiven for thinking there is a real dollop of feaces is in the room. Can make you heave.

Me: Hey Stu, how's it going
squeeeeeaaaaaarrrppppp
Stu: Oh SHIT, that is serious aromatic abuse <wretches>

by Wise Man November 20, 2003

monstered

To drink to too much, to be drunk.

Last night i got absolutely monstered

by Wise Man July 11, 2003

bully

A young hoodlum who revels in making peoples lives a misery during school years. Happily though, when they grow up they will have nothing more to look forward to than getting anally penetrated every day by fellow prisoners in the shower, or, by the prison wardens truncheon ;D

Bully me all you like loser, you're the one who will walk like John Wayne the rest of your life :D

by Wise Man July 17, 2003

Skank

1) To steal or 'permanently borrow'
2) An unpleasant member of the female species, usually linked to the physical appearance/smell.

1) I skanked £10 off me mum
2) That beast is well skanky

by Wise Man November 13, 2006