61 definitions by William Dean A. Garner

Jacket

1. Bodyguard
2. Bad ass

Two "jackets" come pimpin' outta the club, followed by their boss: six-foot, two inches and 170 pounds of pure, unadulterated pussy from heaven. I knew then I was in love. . . .

by William Dean A. Garner September 11, 2003

ambulance chaser

1. Someone who runs after the EASY dream, not willing to do what it takes to earn the real thing.
2. A lazy person who chooses the easy wrong over the hard right.

Lawyers aren't the only "ambulance chasers" out there. Look at all the kids in Hollywood searching for the magic formula that they think will launch them to stardom. None really make it. . . .

by William Dean A. Garner September 20, 2003

butterface

Fat on a man's face that makes the head look like a vertical dumbbell, with puffy jowls.

Until recently, actor John Goodman had a classic butterface, with that quirky dumbbell look to it.

by William Dean A. Garner April 7, 2011

technacious

World-class technical system or gadget, e.g. Xbox, iPad, iPod.

Apple's iPad is the most technacious gadget of 2010! Woo-hoo!

by William Dean A. Garner January 28, 2011

Quantoretto

The smallest unit of matter in the Universe. Makes up the three-dimensional field that is currently (incorrectly) termed "dark matter."

Plural: Quantoretta.

Each quantoretto contains enough energy to power all electrical devices on Earth for millions of years.

by William Dean A. Garner March 16, 2011

master-blaster

A bad-ass handgun, like a .357 Magnum or Desert Eagle .50 cal

Vince pulls out his master-blaster, all seven inches of it, draws a bead on Friar Tuck, says "Adios, asshole!" and pulls the trigger. Friar Tuck disintegrates in a giant red cloud.

by William Dean A. Garner September 18, 2003

tipillating

Any behavior, body language, clothing, etc. on a female waitress or bartender that generates more tips.

She's so tipillating in every way imaginable that she earns a thousand dollars a night in tips alone.

by William Dean A. Garner March 20, 2011