School Kid: “Mr Wheeler, what are qualifications?”
Mr Wheeler: “Unbelievable!! I can tell you’ve never listened to anything I say during lessons. It’s pointless teaching you and nobody ever going to employ you because you’re so bone”.
Mr Wheeler: “Unbelievable!! I can tell you’ve never listened to anything I say during lessons. It’s pointless teaching you and nobody ever going to employ you because you’re so bone”.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 24, 2018
1. Danny got cold feet at the wedding and couldn't say his vowels. The wedding then had to be cut short and both bride and her family never spoke to him again.
2. I'm sitting at a red light in my Dad's high performance Jag which I shouldn't be driving. My old high school bully then rolls up next to me in a Camaro. "Holy shit it's you!!" he says in a surprised but mocking tone. "Hey Johnny, nice wheels" I say, trying to seem somewhat friendly. "Hey! how about I race you FOR PINKS!!!. Or are you gonna get cold feet and chicken out?" Fuck it!! I can't take anymore of this prick. We both floor it on green and I pull ahead faster, At this point I'm laughing. Suddenly I hit something laying in the road and a tyre goes baaboom!! causing the car to flip n roll.
I'm writing this in a hospital bed with my one good arm, Before my dad breaks it when he finds out about his car. What can I say? Sometimes getting cold feet is not always a bad thing.
2. I'm sitting at a red light in my Dad's high performance Jag which I shouldn't be driving. My old high school bully then rolls up next to me in a Camaro. "Holy shit it's you!!" he says in a surprised but mocking tone. "Hey Johnny, nice wheels" I say, trying to seem somewhat friendly. "Hey! how about I race you FOR PINKS!!!. Or are you gonna get cold feet and chicken out?" Fuck it!! I can't take anymore of this prick. We both floor it on green and I pull ahead faster, At this point I'm laughing. Suddenly I hit something laying in the road and a tyre goes baaboom!! causing the car to flip n roll.
I'm writing this in a hospital bed with my one good arm, Before my dad breaks it when he finds out about his car. What can I say? Sometimes getting cold feet is not always a bad thing.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 July 25, 2018
A large powerful and luxurious car that people sometimes drive to try and show their higher importance on the road.
When waiting at red lights a bald guy in a suit pulled up next to me in his shiny black Mercedes S Class. He looked at me thinking he was the shit and I just sarcastically nodded. Lights go green and he floored it, hoping I would drag race him, What a moron.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 24, 2018
"When the shit hits the fan" is the vulgar and more satisfying term for a situation that suddenly gets messy. It gives you an idea of just how messy a situation by comparing it to being in a small room when a handful of loose feces are launched into the spinning fan blades.
1: When that silly old bitch pranged John's prized Mercedes in the parking lot and then tried to take off, shit really hit the fan. I though he was gonna kill her.
2: Where's our fucking money?! You better have it, or the shit is gonna hit the fan, believe you me!!
3: I lost everything back in 2008 when the shit hit the fan. Just like a lot of people.
2: Where's our fucking money?! You better have it, or the shit is gonna hit the fan, believe you me!!
3: I lost everything back in 2008 when the shit hit the fan. Just like a lot of people.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 February 26, 2020
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 25, 2018
Phil is religious and hates homosexuals, he beat the ever-living shit out of his own son when he found out that he takes it up the chuff.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 October 09, 2018