27 definitions by WHISKEYMAN1234
The Office, Probably the most boring and soul destroying place on Planet Earth. It’s Usually a dull coloured room with cheap desks, crap computers, uncomfortable weak chairs, vile tasting coffee, work colleagues who are just as miserable as you are, and a boss who constantly breathes down your neck and watches you waste so many years of your short life for bare minimum wage.
Stan: “Shit!! It’s Monday morning and time to get up. I’ve been throwing my life away in that office for 15 years now and im so tired of it. There’s a whole world out there to see and yet I’m chained to that desk for 9 hours every day”.
Rowena: “Well I know it’s bad and that unfortunately is what it’s like going to work. Anyway you best get up Stan, wouldn’t wanna be late for that meeting with Mr Shipley now would you?”
Stan: “Ohhh please just shoot me!!”
Rowena: “Well I know it’s bad and that unfortunately is what it’s like going to work. Anyway you best get up Stan, wouldn’t wanna be late for that meeting with Mr Shipley now would you?”
Stan: “Ohhh please just shoot me!!”
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 25, 2018
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 25, 2018
Phil is religious and hates homosexuals, he beat the ever-living shit out of his own son when he found out that he takes it up the chuff.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 October 9, 2018
To arrange to meet up with someone you supposedly fancy, then suddenly get cold feet and fuck off into the sunset, never to been seen or heard from again.
Something a decent human being should never do.
Something a decent human being should never do.
Mr No Balls: I'm so nervous I've got the shits, I don't think I can go to the restaurant to see her tonight.
Sibling: Ohhhh man up No Balls!! You have to go. Ghosting is totally frowned upon. You've got to be there in an hour, put your suit on and get in the fucking car.
Mr No Balls: But but I I I d don't think I c c.
Sibling: NOW!!!
Sibling: Ohhhh man up No Balls!! You have to go. Ghosting is totally frowned upon. You've got to be there in an hour, put your suit on and get in the fucking car.
Mr No Balls: But but I I I d don't think I c c.
Sibling: NOW!!!
by WHISKEYMAN1234 July 25, 2018
John: “Honey, I’m afraid I curbed one of the wheels on our car today. I’m so sorry”.
Toni: “Really? Shit!!!, Well that’s life I guess”.
Toni: “Really? Shit!!!, Well that’s life I guess”.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 25, 2018
School Kid: “Mr Wheeler, what are qualifications?”
Mr Wheeler: “Unbelievable!! I can tell you’ve never listened to anything I say during lessons. It’s pointless teaching you and nobody ever going to employ you because you’re so bone”.
Mr Wheeler: “Unbelievable!! I can tell you’ve never listened to anything I say during lessons. It’s pointless teaching you and nobody ever going to employ you because you’re so bone”.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 24, 2018
Mr Shipley: “I’m home”
The wife: “How was your day at work?”
Mr Shipley: Not good!, I’ve had to fire two of my reps, Sonia & Spencer. They just weren’t bringing home the bacon, so told them clear your desks and go, your fired!”.
The wife: “How was your day at work?”
Mr Shipley: Not good!, I’ve had to fire two of my reps, Sonia & Spencer. They just weren’t bringing home the bacon, so told them clear your desks and go, your fired!”.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 25, 2018