WHISKEYMAN1234's definitions
Old geezer: So how was your first day cleaning the bathrooms at Swallow's gay bar?
Cleaner: It was vile!! but pretty funny...... OMG those cubicles were something else!! There was cum, blood, and lube all over the tiles. Numerous rubber johnnys everywhere, some of them were coated in diarrhea. There were lube bottles, wrappers, fag butts and ashes scattered around, and all those needles I found in the bin. The place was a fuckin mess bruv. Oh, and you'll never guess who I saw.
Old geezer: Tell me..
Cleaner: Auntie Lee was there, I saw him in the cleaning room, naked and getting rimmed by some fat bloke. He was crying his eyes out whilst telling the man how much he loves him.
Old geezer: (Laughs) You'll see worse than that the longer you work there son. I know jobs are scarce nowadays but I did warn you about working in those kind of places. Just don't drop your marigolds when cleaning the toilets and if you do leave em for fuck's sake!!! Just like prison, those dirty queers just love pouncing on and pushing poo.
Cleaner: Shit!! I'll remember that.
Cleaner: It was vile!! but pretty funny...... OMG those cubicles were something else!! There was cum, blood, and lube all over the tiles. Numerous rubber johnnys everywhere, some of them were coated in diarrhea. There were lube bottles, wrappers, fag butts and ashes scattered around, and all those needles I found in the bin. The place was a fuckin mess bruv. Oh, and you'll never guess who I saw.
Old geezer: Tell me..
Cleaner: Auntie Lee was there, I saw him in the cleaning room, naked and getting rimmed by some fat bloke. He was crying his eyes out whilst telling the man how much he loves him.
Old geezer: (Laughs) You'll see worse than that the longer you work there son. I know jobs are scarce nowadays but I did warn you about working in those kind of places. Just don't drop your marigolds when cleaning the toilets and if you do leave em for fuck's sake!!! Just like prison, those dirty queers just love pouncing on and pushing poo.
Cleaner: Shit!! I'll remember that.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 July 2, 2019
Get the Pushing poomug. Mr Shipley: “I’m home”
The wife: “How was your day at work?”
Mr Shipley: Not good!, I’ve had to fire two of my reps, Sonia & Spencer. They just weren’t bringing home the bacon, so told them clear your desks and go, your fired!”.
The wife: “How was your day at work?”
Mr Shipley: Not good!, I’ve had to fire two of my reps, Sonia & Spencer. They just weren’t bringing home the bacon, so told them clear your desks and go, your fired!”.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 25, 2018
Get the Firedmug. Taffy was a Welshman Taffy was a theif, Taffy came to my house and stole my Sunday beef, I went to Taffy’s place and Taffy was in bed, So I put on my boxing gloves and punched him on the head.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 24, 2018
Get the Taffymug. The Office, Probably the most boring and soul destroying place on Planet Earth. It’s Usually a dull coloured room with cheap desks, crap computers, uncomfortable weak chairs, vile tasting coffee, work colleagues who are just as miserable as you are, and a boss who constantly breathes down your neck and watches you waste so many years of your short life for bare minimum wage.
Stan: “Shit!! It’s Monday morning and time to get up. I’ve been throwing my life away in that office for 15 years now and im so tired of it. There’s a whole world out there to see and yet I’m chained to that desk for 9 hours every day”.
Rowena: “Well I know it’s bad and that unfortunately is what it’s like going to work. Anyway you best get up Stan, wouldn’t wanna be late for that meeting with Mr Shipley now would you?”
Stan: “Ohhh please just shoot me!!”
Rowena: “Well I know it’s bad and that unfortunately is what it’s like going to work. Anyway you best get up Stan, wouldn’t wanna be late for that meeting with Mr Shipley now would you?”
Stan: “Ohhh please just shoot me!!”
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 25, 2018
Get the Officemug. by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 25, 2018
Get the Hard Workmug. To arrange to meet up with someone you supposedly fancy, then suddenly get cold feet and fuck off into the sunset, never to been seen or heard from again.
Something a decent human being should never do.
Something a decent human being should never do.
Mr No Balls: I'm so nervous I've got the shits, I don't think I can go to the restaurant to see her tonight.
Sibling: Ohhhh man up No Balls!! You have to go. Ghosting is totally frowned upon. You've got to be there in an hour, put your suit on and get in the fucking car.
Mr No Balls: But but I I I d don't think I c c.
Sibling: NOW!!!
Sibling: Ohhhh man up No Balls!! You have to go. Ghosting is totally frowned upon. You've got to be there in an hour, put your suit on and get in the fucking car.
Mr No Balls: But but I I I d don't think I c c.
Sibling: NOW!!!
by WHISKEYMAN1234 July 25, 2018
Get the Ghostingmug. Person 1: Did that asshole drunk driver who killed your son get life behind bars?. Person 2: I wish, Instead he received a hefty fine and was banned from driving for 5 years. Good old justice is no more.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 January 24, 2018
Get the Bannedmug.