To masturbate while driving an automobile. Sometimes you just have to get rid of a rager that just won't go away and you know you will not have the opportunity to do so at the destination location, so you just fire one away on the turn pike.
Tyrant: I hate working this late shifts. It's hard to stay awake on the ride home and I am too tired to bone my gf when I get home.
Big Easy: Dude, you should automobate man. Fire your load on the ride home. Nothing keeps you awake like jackin' the ole pecker doing 85 next to a tractor trailer at midnight.
Big Easy: Dude, you should automobate man. Fire your load on the ride home. Nothing keeps you awake like jackin' the ole pecker doing 85 next to a tractor trailer at midnight.
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm March 05, 2019
While having sexual intercourse with a female in the missionary position, finish inside her. Once you finish, proceed to urinate while you stick your finger down your throat and make yourself vomit as well. Make sure the vomit lands in the goal, "vagina" so that you score the hat trick.
Friend 1: Last night was the tits! I boned a chick and came inside her!
Friend 2: That's it?
Friend 1: What do you mean that's it?
Friend 2: I brought some bitch back from the bar and gave her and scored the Scandinavian Hat Trick bro!
Friend 2: That's it?
Friend 1: What do you mean that's it?
Friend 2: I brought some bitch back from the bar and gave her and scored the Scandinavian Hat Trick bro!
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm May 16, 2017
The act of hanging your penis over someone's shoulder as you are ejaculating, simulating a puking parrot. It is also very beneficial to dress the penis up and mutter, "Polly want a cracker?"
Man: I nutted in my girlfriends mouth last night!
Friend: Cool. I pulled out and gave her a puking parrot last night.
Friend: Cool. I pulled out and gave her a puking parrot last night.
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm April 18, 2017
The surprise piece of corn that gets attached to your penis as you pull out of the anus after having anal sex with a male or female who recently ate corn.
Man: Dude, I boned some chick last night in the ass and when I pulled out, I had a piece of corn stuck to my dick.
Friend: Maybe I should go get you a button nose to go with the corn cock pipe!
Friend: Maybe I should go get you a button nose to go with the corn cock pipe!
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm April 28, 2017
The coloration on the toilet paper after a woman on her period wipes after just gets done slurping up some hot semen into her cunt hole followed by a steamy shit and piss parade. After she runs said toilet paper from the tip of her clam meat all the way through the clit canal to the shit covered asshole and pulls it out to look at it, it would resemble the East Timor Flag; white yellow red and blackish/brown.
Big Easy: Breh, be glad your single. I just saw the sickest shit ever, literally.
Tyrant: let me guess, you stood in the kitchen table and crapped right into your dogs mouth and while Colt was chewing on the pipe, steam was oozing out the side of his mouth?
Big Easy: Huh? Nah man my wife is on the rag and I just pounded the ever living Shit out of her for a good 4 minutes. I go upstairs and sitting right in the unflushed potty is the East Timor Flag.
Tyrant: let me guess, you stood in the kitchen table and crapped right into your dogs mouth and while Colt was chewing on the pipe, steam was oozing out the side of his mouth?
Big Easy: Huh? Nah man my wife is on the rag and I just pounded the ever living Shit out of her for a good 4 minutes. I go upstairs and sitting right in the unflushed potty is the East Timor Flag.
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm January 08, 2021
Referring to Scissors, which specific design is to cut objects, jizzors refers to somebody's sperm that is so potent, whether it be from eating to many citric foods, or from certain medicines, or from too much liquor intake, that when it hits the victim, it starts to cut through their flesh. These cumshots are very common in or around the pussy & asshole, the tits, the back, and the eyelids.
Tyrant: You ever notice how that one partner in our firm eats like 8 oranges a day? I wonder if he ever gets jizzors?
Big Easy: Have you seen his wife? She has welds all over her face. It's like he is melting a candle overtop of her.
Big Easy: Have you seen his wife? She has welds all over her face. It's like he is melting a candle overtop of her.
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm July 26, 2019
The act of shooting a fresh load of sperm onto a piping hot piece of shit that you currently have resting in a skillet on your stovetop. You then patiently scrape the penal cheese out of your foreskin (known as smegma) on top of the cum log and bake on medium for approximately 12 minutes or until the jizz turns a dark yellow. Set aside to cool down, this is obviously not for consumption, that would be disgusting. You then take the room temp smeg foo young and blend it into a fine liquid. Proceed to pour that liquid into a funnel that you have placed into your penis hole and enjoy!
Mike 1: Yo man, do you want to get Chinese food later? Im thinking some egg foo young?
Mike 2: That shit is gross. How about we get some smeg foo young instead and feed our boners?
Mike 2: That shit is gross. How about we get some smeg foo young instead and feed our boners?
by Uncle Gary's Potato Farm May 26, 2017