Two Hep Cats's definitions

deranged

What happens to vaqueros who leave the prairie too quickly.

Jorge galloped off the ranch an' got hisself deranged. Boy's brain was plumb pasturized. Too mas loco weed, pendejo.

by Two Hep Cats January 4, 2013

Phoneto

A photograph taken with your smartphone.

I can't believe how good a phoneto you just uploaded. What kind of phone did you use to shoot it?

by Two Hep Cats July 17, 2011

skidmark

TV ad that stays onscreen during the entire program.

TV advertisers started with logo bugs, moved on to pharts and then graduated to skidmarks. Next, they'll move the program down to one corner of the screen and run continual ads over the remaining 90%.

by Two Hep Cats December 9, 2012

RGP

Rich Guy Propaganda. A principle of life that every educated person needs to know--that Rich Guys use the principles of propaganda to fool the gullible into thinking that what's good for the rich is good for them.

Notice how, during every election, Rich Guys repackage trickle-down economics and try to sell it all over again? It's nothing but RGP bullshit, lipstick on the same old, greedy pig.

by Two Hep Cats April 14, 2013

Fido's Law

Dogs expand to fill the sofa available.

Mutt: Dude--I can't sit down. Your sofa's completely covered with dogs.

Jeff: Fido's Law, man.

by Two Hep Cats June 2, 2013

Overbooking

Overposting on Facebook. An ego disorder leading people to believe their friends want to hear from them more than once or twice a week.

Dude, I'm totally progressive. But, when you Outrage-Post 19 political articles and videos in 3 hours--that's Overbooking!

by Two Hep Cats April 13, 2011

Theory of Maximum Foolishness

The world will arrange itself to make you--personally--feel maximally foolish.

Murphy's Law is a subset of the Theory of Maximum Foolishness. ML says "Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong." Often, that is true. However, the TOMF says that if something can go RIGHT that would make you look MORE foolish, then that is what will happen.

For example, ML predicts that bread will always fall butter-side down. But, if I TELL YOU it will fall butter-side down, when I go to actually SHOW YOU, the bread will fall butter-side up, making me feel maximally foolish.

The TOMF is true, but neither verifiable nor falsifiable to others because, whatever conditions you establish to test it, only YOU will know if the result made you feel maximally foolish. Of course it will, but only you will know that.

by Two Hep Cats October 16, 2009