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Two Hep Cats's definitions

videophart

An unstoppable video that begins on a Web page, no matter what your browser settings for video auto-play are, and can only be stopped manually. The most insidious versions can't be stopped at all.
CNN has started using videopharts. Doesn't matter how you set your browser, they load and begin playing automatically until you manually shut them off.
by Two Hep Cats June 23, 2017
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DonTcare

DONald Trump-Care. (pron. "Don-T-Care") The Republican "replacement" for Obamacare. Hey--it's the plan that doesn't give a shit about you, your health, or your bank account (except for emptying it and handing it over to rich folks).
I have no health insurance. I have DonTcare--"The Closest Thing to Nothing"
by Two Hep Cats March 25, 2017
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Phart

One of those smelly little "silent-but-deadly" ads that pops up in one corner of the TV screen 30 seconds into the program, after you've already endured 5 minutes of regular ads.
AMC used to be a great channel until they started pharting.
by Two Hep Cats October 10, 2009
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deranged

What happens to vaqueros who leave the prairie too quickly.
Jorge galloped off the ranch an' got hisself deranged. Boy's brain was plumb pasturized. Too mas loco weed, pendejo.
by Two Hep Cats January 4, 2013
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Texbook

Any school textbook that filters reality through a fancifully enthusiastic neo-conservative agenda.
Copping a page from the Iranian Playbook, the Texas Board of Education removed Thomas Jefferson from Texbooks because he believed in the separation of church and state.
by Two Hep Cats March 17, 2010
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asstorrhoid

A hemorrhoid the size of a meteor. And twice as hot.
I can't go horseback riding with you tomorrow, dude.

Why not?

Asstorrhoids.
by Two Hep Cats October 30, 2010
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Postaholic

An attention-seeker who compulsively, addictively blogs or posts to a social networking site many times a day.
Sarah's a postaholic. Six, seven times a day she pathetically pukes out where she is, what she's eating, what she's watching on TV. Who gives a flying fork?
by Two Hep Cats July 10, 2011
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