TurkTurkleton's definitions

Alcohol

The cause and solution to all of life's problems.

Homer Simpson: To Alcohol, the cause and solution to all of life's problems.

by TurkTurkleton August 21, 2011

Swagophile

Borderline-retarded teenagers (and sometimes twenty-somethings) who think that having "swag" holds any meaning in the real world. Swagophiles have become very common in social media recently, especially facebook and tumblr. Swagophiles are known to post sentimental BS over a filtered instagram photo in an attempt to sound deep, when really it is just a cry for attention. Swagophiles also have the tendency to believe that having "swag" is more important than anything, including, but not limited to intelligence/good grades/education, a unique personality, an actual talent, friends, etc.

Retarded Swagophile#1: Who needs good grades when you have swag?

Retarded Swagophile#2: Who needs a condom when you got swag?

Retarded Swagophile#3: Who needs a personality when you got swag?

Forever Alone Swagophile: Who needs friends when you got swag?

Retarded Swagophile#4: Oh my god, look at this quote I posted over an instagram photo, I'm so deep!!!

by TurkTurkleton July 17, 2012

Donkey-brained

A term coined by the great Charlie Kelly meaning someone who possesses inferior intelligence and a lack of common sense, similar to a donkey, or activity that would suggest such.

Dennis eating cereal while driving was completely Donkey-brained.

by TurkTurkleton June 6, 2013

Diabetis

What Wilford Brimley has.

I'm Wilford Brimley and I have diabetis.

by TurkTurkleton August 20, 2011

sex, drugs, and rock & roll

Motley Crue.

If you looked up sex, drugs, and rock & roll in the dictionary you'd see a picture of Motley Crue. In the 80s and 90s all four members of Motley Crue got more ass than a toilet seat and did enough drugs to kill a wild Keith Richards (and almost Nikki Sixx in 87).

by TurkTurkleton August 23, 2011