ToddUncommon's definitions
Much like a worm burner, it is a ball struck with such great velocity along the surface of the ground that it would "brutally molest" or skin the length of a snake. Usually applied in golf or soccer.
by ToddUncommon June 29, 2010
Get the snake raper mug.The mealy-mouthed, weasel-worded, chickenshit phrasing that brand advertising likes to believe is "reassuring" about massively negative global events, instead of using real words about what may be going on, like "pandemic" and/or "economic crisis" and/or "presidential incompetence".
Singular form: "(this) difficult time"
Singular form: "(this) difficult time"
"In these "uncertain times", disposable toilet seat covers are more critical than ever, like airlines and vacation cruises. Remember, sometimes the only thing between you and a coronavirus droplet might be a Big Johnson Ass Gasket."
by ToddUncommon March 30, 2020
Get the Uncertain Times mug.The technically correct way to spell the name of the popular performer and expert on both the second-oldest and the oldest professions in the world: show business and prostitution, respectively.
Due to the market increase in dim-witted skanktacular performers leading to slut inflation, the previous dollar sign in her name has been demoted to mere cents.
Due to the market increase in dim-witted skanktacular performers leading to slut inflation, the previous dollar sign in her name has been demoted to mere cents.
Person A: "Did you see what that attention whore Ke¢ha wore on Jimmy Kimmel last night?"
Person B: "No. Wait, I thought her name was pronounced 'Ke$ha'."
Person A: "Well, it was. But she's an even cheaper slut now, I guess. You could totally tell that the jeggings she wore was actually dirty, and not like stage dirty. Gross."
Person B: "No. Wait, I thought her name was pronounced 'Ke$ha'."
Person A: "Well, it was. But she's an even cheaper slut now, I guess. You could totally tell that the jeggings she wore was actually dirty, and not like stage dirty. Gross."
by ToddUncommon March 2, 2011
Get the Ke¢ha mug.Another name for the world's foremost social networking circle-jerk website, where members expose themselves and flog and flagellate their most annoying parts for all to see, whether you like it or not.
by ToddUncommon March 20, 2011
Get the Fapsbook mug.Teacher: "Class, who is the current President of the US?"
Dustin: "Donald Trump?"
Teacher: "Close. Anyone else?"
Bianca: "Some bagel-faced dipshit?"
Teacher: "Correct!"
Dustin: "Donald Trump?"
Teacher: "Close. Anyone else?"
Bianca: "Some bagel-faced dipshit?"
Teacher: "Correct!"
by ToddUncommon March 20, 2020
Get the Bagel-faced Dipshit mug.Applied to soccer, it occurs when one or more players of the same team is playing unintelligently or inattentively, such as dribbling aimlessly in their backfield, as young children may idly play with their own or each other's genitals, regardless of gender.
It also can be applied in general to any activity where at least one person is blissfully but dangerously not paying attention to something critical.
It also can be applied in general to any activity where at least one person is blissfully but dangerously not paying attention to something critical.
Soccer: You two, stop playing touch pee-pee and move the ball up the field!
Life: Hey, you! Quit playing touch pee-pee and help me lift this into the truck!
Life: Hey, you! Quit playing touch pee-pee and help me lift this into the truck!
by ToddUncommon June 29, 2010
Get the touch pee-pee mug.Ron DeathSentence is sometimes known as Ron DeSantis, the squinty-eyed, failed toilet brush salesman who became governor of Florida. Characterized by a desire to both go full douche and probe his own anus for signs of intelligence, he refuses to breathe the same air as his constituents, as he burns through his voters like logs on a campfire.
Ron DeathSentence enjoys killing his own citizens with anti-mask, anti-vaccine, and anti-intelligence policies with equal measures of arrogance and cowardice.
by ToddUncommon September 3, 2021
Get the Ron DeathSentence mug.