The Gonzo Lecture's definitions
Someone appointed from another institution by a university to question every little, trivial detail of an assessment or graded paper in order to justify their own hefty stipend, make lecturers' lives annoyingly miserable (thus reminding them they are still only employees) and to feign the appearance of academic quality.
Elvira: Leo the external examiner has returned your examination for review because some of the questions require commas to be added. Make sure you do this before you leave the office at 2.30pm today.
Chuck: If all Leo has to do for his money is correct my grammar, then I'd be grateful if you'd ask him to stick that examination paper up his fat arse.
Chuck: If all Leo has to do for his money is correct my grammar, then I'd be grateful if you'd ask him to stick that examination paper up his fat arse.
by The Gonzo Lecture March 25, 2010
Get the external examiner mug.A word used by academics to confuse students and justify all manner of outrageous crimes against humanity in the name of education. It is primarily applied in situations when an academic requires the ability to smokescreen their own maladjusted intention and win unwinnable arguments with the minimum amount of effort.
Jane "Professor, I'd like you to explain to me why I got such a low grade."
Professor "Well I don't really have the time to explain the inner workings of pedagogy to you young lady. Even if i did, I'm not sure I could help you to understand."
Jane "Huh? What are you talking about?"
Professor "You see? Exactly."
Professor "Well I don't really have the time to explain the inner workings of pedagogy to you young lady. Even if i did, I'm not sure I could help you to understand."
Jane "Huh? What are you talking about?"
Professor "You see? Exactly."
by The Gonzo Lecture March 3, 2010
Get the pedagogy mug.Jase the Inker: Isn't that a pleasant sound to the ears of the needle choir?
Customer: Ah fuck, watch what you're doing, that really hurts you fucker!
Customer: Ah fuck, watch what you're doing, that really hurts you fucker!
by The Gonzo Lecture April 18, 2010
Get the needle choir mug.A term first coined by Dr Gregory House in season 6 episode 13 to denote the feigning of a practical joke on oneself to avert suspicion from other people about one's guilt as a prankster.
Wilson:You created empirical proof that I didn't prank you selling me on the notion that you didn't prank. Maybe you self-pranked.
House: I don't masturprank
House: I don't masturprank
by The Gonzo Lecture March 25, 2010
Get the masturprank mug.An important aspect of experience design which can be applied in a variety of contexts and applications depending on the event concerned and the required outcome. In events, the "wow" factor refers to an impressive and impactful element of the design which is used by the designer to reinforce particular aspects of the attendant's experience, usually resulting in particular sensory stimulation (visual, auditory, etc) which can be used to facilitate memory formation and retention afterwards. Whilst popularly thought to require originality in creativity, the wow factor is usually produced using cues familiar to its receivers.
Bill: Wow, look at those fireworks dude, they are really special.
Ben: Wow, yeah dude. They really add the wow factor. Totally fucking unforgettable.
Ben: Wow, yeah dude. They really add the wow factor. Totally fucking unforgettable.
by The Gonzo Lecture March 5, 2010
Get the wow factor mug.A learning strategy devised by academics to divert attention from themselves and their own activities, cut down on teaching time and cause the maximum amount of stress and discomfort to their students. Groupwork involves the administration of complex, indecipherable assessment tasks which students are left to spend long hours together in each others' company to figure out leading often to short periods of abusive conflict and sometimes even longer periods of fornication and even marriage.
Jemima: Professor, can you please answer me a question about our assignment?
Professor: No I can't. You see, it's groupwork. You have to figure it out together with your team mates. Why not go and ask Brad to help you. He looks like he'd be happy to straighten you out. I have to go now and see if that infernal coffee bar is open yet.
Professor: No I can't. You see, it's groupwork. You have to figure it out together with your team mates. Why not go and ask Brad to help you. He looks like he'd be happy to straighten you out. I have to go now and see if that infernal coffee bar is open yet.
by The Gonzo Lecture March 25, 2010
Get the groupwork mug.A release of gas from the anal cavity renowned for its particular moistness and pungent odour. Unlike a normal fart, and other categories of cruel fart, the swamp fart is distinct in a number of important respects. It is formed by poorly-digested vegetable or fruit matter incubating in the colon for an extended time period. This results in an uncomfortable build-up of methane gas, which when combined with semi-liquid foodstuffs, produces a wet fart sound when omitted. This is often confused with a pudding fart due to its bass timbre. However, a swamp fart is so foul smelling that it causes an immediate gagging response from those nearby. Commonly, those responsible for swamp farts quickly vacate the environments contaminated by their own farticles both to avoid blame and to check their undergarments for undesirable debris, often referred to as fart sauce.
Kimi and Chaz are sitting in their local pizza restaurant.
Kimi: Was that you Chaz? God that stinks!
Chaz: (Sniggers) Sorry love, I just produced an impromptu swamp fart. Better out than though, I can tell you!
Kimi: You're disgusting Chaz! Shall we order now?
Chaz: No...I have to go to the bathroom. I think I might have fart sauce in my shorts...
Kimi: Was that you Chaz? God that stinks!
Chaz: (Sniggers) Sorry love, I just produced an impromptu swamp fart. Better out than though, I can tell you!
Kimi: You're disgusting Chaz! Shall we order now?
Chaz: No...I have to go to the bathroom. I think I might have fart sauce in my shorts...
by The Gonzo Lecture March 3, 2010
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