The Gonzo Lecture's definitions

Academic Consultant

A grandiose windbag who bullshits for a fee. They can't do anything useful, so they enter teaching, but they find out they can't teach very well so they try to teach teachers, but the teacher they teach think they are tossers, so they become academic consultants.

Chas: Who the fuck is that grandiose tosser at the front of the room who keeps bullshitting?

Nick: He's what's called an Academic Consultant. Tosser.

by The Gonzo Lecture March 25, 2010

wow factor

An important aspect of experience design which can be applied in a variety of contexts and applications depending on the event concerned and the required outcome. In events, the "wow" factor refers to an impressive and impactful element of the design which is used by the designer to reinforce particular aspects of the attendant's experience, usually resulting in particular sensory stimulation (visual, auditory, etc) which can be used to facilitate memory formation and retention afterwards. Whilst popularly thought to require originality in creativity, the wow factor is usually produced using cues familiar to its receivers.

Bill: Wow, look at those fireworks dude, they are really special.

Ben: Wow, yeah dude. They really add the wow factor. Totally fucking unforgettable.

by The Gonzo Lecture March 5, 2010

Avatared

Refers to being stepped over and ignored with respect to one's rightful accolades. It's origin stems from the audacious treatment of the movie Avatar by the Oscar's Award committee in the 2010 ceremony when it picked up only 3 production related awards and lost out to another, much less grossing movie called Hurt Locker.

Dude 1: I can't understand why I never get promoted at work.

Dude 2: That's because you keep gettin Avatared.

by The Gonzo Lecture March 8, 2010

Work

The deceitful act of making oneself appear busy during office hours in return for payment.

I'd love to help with that important task, but I've got some other work I need to do.

by The Gonzo Lecture March 3, 2010

groupwork

A learning strategy devised by academics to divert attention from themselves and their own activities, cut down on teaching time and cause the maximum amount of stress and discomfort to their students. Groupwork involves the administration of complex, indecipherable assessment tasks which students are left to spend long hours together in each others' company to figure out leading often to short periods of abusive conflict and sometimes even longer periods of fornication and even marriage.

Jemima: Professor, can you please answer me a question about our assignment?

Professor: No I can't. You see, it's groupwork. You have to figure it out together with your team mates. Why not go and ask Brad to help you. He looks like he'd be happy to straighten you out. I have to go now and see if that infernal coffee bar is open yet.

by The Gonzo Lecture March 25, 2010

Cum Catcher

A slang term for a woman. Considered by many (mostly women) to be a derogatory term used by people (usually men) to suggest a particular woman enjoys the practice of having men ejaculating semen into and onto various parts of her body.

"She's a real fucking cum catcher..."

"Here it comes, you fucking cum catcher!"

by The Gonzo Lecture March 3, 2010

Jon Stewart

Widely considered by many to be the most important Jew on the earth.

The indisputable importance of Jon Stewart was confirmed by the Family Guy character, Mort Goldman who exclaimed “Protect Jon Stewart! He's our most important Jew!”

by The Gonzo Lecture March 3, 2010