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The Evil Steve's definitions

ALL CAPS

Obviously, ALL CAPS is the act of typing in all capital letters. The following definitions and examples are to tell you what the all-caps typer's intent is:

1) When used sparingly, typing in all caps emphasizes those words the writer considers critical.

2) When writing rhyme, all caps indicates the syllable/word/beat to be read as accentuated.

3) When used like singles in a strip club, all caps indicates the writer thinks nearly everything spewing from his mouth is of utmost importance. This is the same kind of douchebag who highlights 85% of a textbook. Usually, the writing was forwarded to him from some dogmatic groupthink processing center he subscribes to, but to feel like he contributed, he'll all-caps a fartload of words. Often seen with excessive exclamation points.

4a) When an entire piece of writing is all caps, that person's caps lock is stuck. They need a new keyboard.

4b) When an entire piece of writing is all caps, it was written by a COBOL or FORTRAN programmer, or data-entry person who has worked on COBOL or FORTRAN programs since 1979. They're lost to us on the whole caps-lock issue... just snap their suspenders or flick paperclips into their beehives and move on.
1) Before feeding lions sausages, DO NOT rub your genitals with beef tallow!

2) There ONCE was a MAN from NanTUCKet

3) The JEWS and BLACKS are in CAHOUTS with THE ONE-WORLD GOVERNMENT and they INTEND to TAKE OVER NASCAR!!!!!

4a) DAMMIT! TWENTY BUCKS DOWN THE FLUSHER FOR A NEW KEYBOARD!

4b) WHEN PRESIDENT FORD SENT ME HIS NOTE ON ARPANET, IT WAS IN ALL CAPS. WHO AM I TO ARGUE WITH SUCH A GREAT MAN?
by The Evil Steve August 25, 2005
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Nibbenmilf, Land of

Combination of the terms NBN and MILF which describes a mythical realm dripping with perpetually horny drop-dead gorgeous women between the ages of 35-50. Some upper-middle-class planned suburban communities bursting at the seams with trophy wives may qualify, but most of us will only see them on TV or in the movies.
Fairview from Desperate Housewives may be the mythical Land of Nibbenmilf.
by The Evil Steve August 25, 2005
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only when I'm pregnant

A male person's definitive "never" response. Puts to rest the relentless drunk friend-of-friend who tries to force you into a flase confession.
Drunk FoF: "Dude, would you ever consider nailing Snooki?"
Dude: "No."
Drunk FoF: "Not even if your were drunk?"
Dude: "Never."
Drunk FoF: "Even if you're drunk, horny, and she's playing with your balls?"
Dude: "Only when I'm pregnant."
by The Evil Steve November 16, 2011
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buy their razor

Sports-related: to knock a team out of playoff contention. Derived from the tendency for sports teams to grow their beards during the playoffs as a sign of team unity.
The Chargers bought the Titans their razor(buy their razor) last night by pounding them 42-17 in Tennessee, knocking the Titans to 7-8 and completely out of the playoff chase.
by The Evil Steve December 26, 2009
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epidemic

1. (dictionary) Widespread contagion, usually a bacteria or virus, that kills or severly sickens a large number people in a particular geographic area.

2. (American Media) Half-assed drug or dumbass activity that kills a couple suburban white kids, usually in the Baltimore area for some reason.
1. The SARS epidemic of 2003 killed hundreds and hospitalized thousands in China and Toronto.

2. Stone Phillips reporting on the highway surfing epidemic... Ashleigh Banfield to follow with an expose on the paint-huffing epidemic.
by The Evil Steve September 5, 2005
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mangina

1) Derisive term for a man's feminine side - especially when he's picky, touchy or emotional about something seemingly minor.
2) The bumhole - almost always a man's, and usually used in a prison-dating context.
1) Jesus, Steve, all I said was your car needs washed... you didn't have to flash me your mangina!
2) You got sentenced to three years in State? Guard your mangina and don't drop the soap.
by The Evil Steve September 23, 2005
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sirmixalotropia

A metabolic condition which causes ladies to carry extra weight in the gluteus maximii, thus causing Baby to have Back.
Sirmixalotropia is the condition which elicits a springing response when a girl walks in with a itty-bitty waist and a round thing in your face.
by The Evil Steve July 15, 2011
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